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The Hodges
5th September 2007, 06:13 PM
Hi guys,

As we’ve been here for six months, we’d thought that we’d write down some of our thoughts and feelings. You may not agree, but hopefully you’ll understand where we’re coming from.

First of all we re-read our three month post (http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=11965) and it is good to review the things in the cold light of day.

KIWI LIFESTYLE

We moved out to NZ for many reasons, but one of which was a lifestyle choice. We’re trying to make the most of it and we try to things that we won’t ordinarily have done in the UK and we both love the Kiwi lifestyle now. We love the weekends and the time that we get off. We are out a lot more than we ever were, making the most of what NZ has to offer.

We did go back to the UK for ten days and it did make us realise what we took for granted. Our local park, the pub, shops, general choice etc., but would be trade it for NZ, probably not at the moment, but time, and priorities, change.

MEETING PEOPLE

We have met lots of wonderful people, many of those through this forum.

However, we are well aware of the fact that you get out of life what you put in to it and we have tried to meet as many people as we can, making use of any arbitrary lead. Tony has even joined a rugby club, making 15 friends instantly and we try to say yes to every opportunity. We’ve learnt that even if you think you’re going to dread it, go, as we’ve enjoyed 99% of the do’s that we’ve been too.

FAMILY & FRIENDS

We still miss our family and friends, although they don’t seem to email as often as we like. The more important ones seem to be staying in contact anyway. I sent out various emails when we arrived and I have set myself a rule to reply to any that I receive back. So far, this rule has worked, but often the lack of responses have disappointed us.

We do have family coming over though, and we’re really looking forward to sharing NZ with them.

COST OF LIVING

For those that are interested, for the two of us (we live in a three bedroomed duplex bungalow, run two cars and we don’t live extravagantly) it costs us $1,700-$1,800 a month (excluding rent).

FRUSTRATIONS

We have found that employers are more inclined to press their employees harder than we are used too. We have learnt to be more assertive (and dare I say it, less like Poms). We do not mean being bullied, but, for example, it is expected that we work longer hours than we did in the UK and out of hours without being compensated for it.

Also, it frustrates us that some colleagues, who may work longer hours, are not as productive as we are used to, and so we are firm believers of working smarter and not harder rule.

We have come in to contact with bureaucracy and we have found it very difficult, and impossible in many instances, for a different point of view to be accepted. Not because it’s wrong, just because it’s not what their used to. There is a bigger picture in many decisions, but it seems some people have difficultly seeing it.

SUMMARY

So have things changed since our three month post? Not really. We’re still in the same position. There are some things that infuriate us and other things that we love. Hopefully we’ll be able to accept the things that get under our skin, but we’re loving the experience overall.

Do we regret being here? Not a chance, but will we stay forever, we can’t tell. Nothing in life is permanent and we admire everyone on this forum for giving this a go.

Cheers. :cheers

Sam B
5th September 2007, 07:21 PM
Thanks for your thoughtfu and interesting post. I'm glad you're enjoying life here on the whole.

I really identified with the email thing - since moving here, I have sent out regular emails and photos to all my family and friends - and at first I was inundated with replies. But as time has gone on, the replies have dwindled and now it's just my closest friends who are in regular contact. I can understand why (sort of). My family are hopeless at using computers and prefer to ring and write. My friends have moved on - they have probably accepted that they are unlikely to see us again, and got on with their lives, whilst I still yearn for the friendships I left behind, because the new ones are still too young to offer real support. Obviously there are some very good friendships that will always stay in touch, but even they email less than I do. Perhaps they feel that their news isn't as interesting as mine, but of course that isn't true, I cling on to all the news about the UK, however mundane.

peebles16
5th September 2007, 08:35 PM
Thanks to both of you for your posts and your honesty it helps. The email general keeping in touch thing does worry me a bit. When I lived overseas before it was the same started with a large group of people keeping in touch that dwindled down but I was desperate to hear even the boring mundane stuff too. That was a while ago now and am hoping with all the IT stuff around that it'll be better this time and am getting older family members up to speed with email etc as we speak. Thanks again for your posts.

The Hodges
5th September 2007, 08:45 PM
Sam B & Peebles16 - I couldn't have said it better myself. :nice1

BaldyBeardyBloke
5th September 2007, 10:00 PM
Interesting. I tend to agree on the whole, but equally I find myself thinking that over time the mundane stuff I used to enjoy hearing about from the UK is being replaced by mundane stuff from here which has an increasingly greater relevance to me.

The true friends & family will keep in touch and supply enough UK news to keep me up to date with what is important from back home. I think this is part of a 'letting go' process. The more I find the mundane stuff in life being NZ centric the more I find myself feeling 'settled'

I found the same when I moved from Leeds to Scotland. The physical distance seems to have little relevance.

That's just me of course. We're all different.

M&J
5th September 2007, 10:03 PM
A great post, thanks.

I too can identify with the e-mail thing, I love getting e-mails form the UK but after nearly three months here, they are dwindling. :(

But I'll keep sending them out as hopefully hearing about our great adventure they will come and visit instead!!!

Cheers

Jo

BaldyBeardyBloke
5th September 2007, 10:11 PM
There's a good reason not to email the mother-in-law :)

jubjub
5th September 2007, 10:14 PM
Nice post...

contact with old pals is always a strange one, some people pop up now and then, others have vanished... and some surprising folks have kept in touch, weird huh?

I also subscribed to the take every invite school, as if you dont you end up home alone to a large extent, as time goes on you can turn down one or two if you really dont fancy it, and start to issue invites of your own.

You are a day closer to your 9mth post....

Tia Maria
6th September 2007, 09:29 AM
Great post guys, I must remember to go back to your 3 month post and compare, its always interesting to see how people's outlook changes over time.

Same here with the email thing and its a good point that Sam made about friends back home still have a network of established friends to turn to while we are still getting to know people so we feel the separation more.

I think this also explains why whenever I phone a friend who hasn't emailed for years they are always really excited to hear from me and we chat like we just saw each other yesterday. Being in a new place we have time to dwell on these things whereas for friends back home life returns to normal pretty quickly once we've gone.

Having lived away from my hometown several times before I have got use to this and I know sometimes I even have to send out an email reminding them its my birthday and that all Birthday emails/cards/bottle of Tia Maria would be much appreciated :D .

On the whole the good friendships do keep going, sometimes the most unlikely ones, its just people are naff at keeping in touch. Maybe texting is the way to go?!

Looking forward to your next post!

Cheers

Tia

Caroline and Dave
6th September 2007, 09:10 PM
Hi Clare and Tony,

I am really glad to hear you are settling down and enjoying life.I can't wait to get back to NZ so we can meet up again as you are great company to be with.You were the first of the gang of 3 to come over . It still seems like yesterday when we first met in St Albans and yet so much has happened. Only 3 weeks to go now and I am really looking forward to being reunited with Caroline again. I miss her so much.
Well thats enough waffling

See you soon
Dave.
By the way I have just realised this post to you has made me a senior member and I don't have one grey hair yet.

benandclare
6th September 2007, 09:14 PM
Great post guys, keep them coming :raebanana :raebanana

Ben

Myrkk
8th September 2007, 01:35 AM
Lots of interesting posts on this thread. We too have the done the moving around lots thing and it is interesting to see who keeps in touch. The really important people always keep in touch even if you haven't seen them for years or phoned or e-mailed.
I quite enjoy the phone calls out of the blue and the catching up.
Friendships change over the years and some people move on naturally.

I'm wondering whether we should be moving back to Scotland rather than half way across the world at the moment and this thread has made me realise how little the life I would have in Scotland now would resemble the one I left behind.

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