[Soon2baKiwi]

Jo, sometimes there's just bad 'uns. 8 in my family and 7 are similar in their education and careers. My brother who was the first boy was absolutely adored by my mother and father. Old fashioned, Irish parents with two girls already and this boy comes along :nice1 The first time he went missing he was 4! And that was it for him. He got hidings, pleadings, you name it - he just didn't give a toss. He used to disappear for days on end right up until his 20s. Thankfully, we lived in the country and the opportunity wasn't there for him to get into serious trouble. He did ok though :uhoh he got the same parenting as the rest of us - it's probably true though that you love the one most that gives you the most trouble (maybe that's only true in Ireland??).

[Diny]

Reading the latter posts on this thread has prompted a couple of 'off on a tangent' thoughts.

Talking about respect. PB and I have always instilled in our boys that good manners, respect and consideration for others is THE most important thing. If you master these then the rest is alot easier to handle. But this is where (deep down) I'm in conflict with myself. The saying 'respect your elders' is familiar to us all (or at least I hope it is). But what happens if those elders show no respect?

I'm a firm believer that respect, good manners and consideration is part of a reciprocal agreement. For instance:

If somebody holds a door open for me, steps aside to let me pass, pulls into the side of the road to give me right of way or helps me in any similar way, it's just second nature to me to make eye contact, smile and say an audiable thankyou. However, I can honestly say that I've lost count of how many times I've done the same for a 'dear little old lady' only to have her walk straight past without so much as a nod. They have that set jaw look on their face which just says "I'm old - good manners do not apply to me and the world owes me a living". They let doors swing in your face and they allow you to hold them open for them, step aside, help them on their way but you get nothing in return. But yee gads could you imagaine the wobbly voiced protests of 'the youth of today' and of course the broken record of 'I'm only a pensioner' if you should give them a dose of their own medicine.

My dad was recently in hospital and I would go most days to visit him. The hospital car park was 2 pounds for 2 hours minimum charge. On my first visit I parked and went to see my dad. Because he was still abit groggy after his op I only stayed for about 30 mins. When I returned to my car there was a good hour and 20 mins left on my ticket. An elderly couple (I'd say they were mid 70's) had just pulled in next to me as I got to the car. They were getting some change together for the pay and display. I gave them my ticket as it had so much time left on it. The woman looked at me then looked away. The man took it, didn't even look me in the face and said 'that'll do'. I was so cross I actually stood there and said 'don't mention it sir' (after all the world owed him a living 'cos he'd reached in excess of his 3 score year and ten). If somebody had given me 1 hour and 20 mins worth of free parking I would have at the very least said thanks and given them some eye contact and a smile.

Also .... just because this has sprung to mind ......... I always remember something my mum said to me when I had my first baby. It was said with much humour and tongue in cheek. She told me to always educate my children to the highest standards possible both in school and as a parent because as soon as they fly the nest, the inevitable feeling of freedom and natural rebelion will mean those standards drop. We both laughed at the time because it wasn't said with any real intent. However I often think how right that comment was.

Diny

Diny

[Annierobrigado]

hello moms and dads

why do the students change rooms after one class? why can't they just be assigned one room and the teachers be the ones to transfer from room to room, depending on the schedule? that way, you don't have to contend with the kids scattering all over the hallways trying to make it to the next room (at the end of the hall) for their next class. :laugh this is how we do it here, so all the noise is confined to the kids' respective classrooms. (and the teachers are the ones running, hahaha)

and there's a wall clock that tells you oops, i only have 3 minutes before the bell rings. i can wind up my lecture, give out the assignment and say goodbye.

i suppose some kids are born respectful, maybe because they see it in their homes, so many of our students will respectfully wait for the lecturer or teacher to wind up and end his lecture before barrelling out of the school, even if the bell has rung. it's just the way it is here. maybe in nz it is too. but a wall clock would help the teacher greatly. :laugh

i agree with having good manners and the right conduct starting at home. we who believe in it should definitely teach our kids to be that way, whether there are people out there who do the same or not. it's a reflection of one's upbringing if one can still be respectful to a rude and obnoxious person.

kids can be outspoken without being rude and obnoxious. sometimes the quietly spoken word is more effective than the shouted one. ;)

it's so hard to live in this world, ain't it?
:angel

annie

[Diny]

Brilliant posting Annie :nice1 :nice1 :nice1

Diny

[Jo and Andy]

I agree with you all on the idea that politeness and respect is important, and needs to be followed up from the home into school etc.

Back on education, I mean't to mention a while ago, that when working for a university, we discussed the standard of education in the UK and the rising standards of qualifications coming out of the schools.

It was noted that although maths had very high pass rates, the university was now having to give maths lessons to engineering students as part of the course, as they could not cope with it.

And they say A'levels and O'Levels are the same standard as GCSE's today. Load of tosh.

A lot of students nowerdays, beleive that having got into Uni, it does not matter what they do they are guaranteed or should be given a degree, they enrolled after all.

As for the genearl manners of the students, I would say I was only impressed by the manners of foreign students.

Please let NZ be different!

[markkellaway]

Ignoring what will happen in NZ, because none of us can be sure, take a look at the following:

Grades Article (http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/allnews/tm_objectid=14655427%26method=full%26siteid=50143% 26headline=45%2d%2dis%2denough%2dfor%2dmaths%2d%2d a%2d-name_page.html)

I know it's from the Mirror but the numbers are the important thing. In my day 16% would have put you in the "remedial" class. :no

Mark. :P

[Danpoll]

does it not go back to the phrase children should be seen and not heard, dont go totally drocnian, send em bak down mine, children and mobiles gets me.

crap is placed on us parents that if you dont pander and spoil and let have therapy and treat the home as a democartic instition where free votes for all. If not your a bad parent and an abuser.


As regards to Diny's post regarding car parking, I would say stuff em keep the ticket I paid for it. people not thanking you, its people you let out when driving or on motorways they should thank you but do they. So Now I let no one in or out stuff em.

Sad but treat those how you would wish to be treated, no treat them like they treat you.

Dan

[Timbo]

Following on to Mark`s Grades comment;

http://home.nzcity.co.nz/news/default.asp?id=47094

[Danpoll]

When I left school a decade ago, allready the seeds of change where being planted. Schools with the sole intrest in being in the premier league, establishing those from as early as possible who would bring them glory and who would not. The glory students had the expereinced teachers the resources and the oppurtunity to win, the B teams were left with the new teachers just out of Uni so they could learn their craft. Then you had your injurys who if you can class them as special needs then this works as damage limitation. and also promoted the schools image in helping the unfortunate. The cambridge and oxford ethos is in public schooling in the UK. evreybody keen to be well placed on the table. In the meantime the customers are being forgotten(pupils) but stats are evreything arent they.

Dan