[willsken]

I posted this on another thread and it would seem to be a good topic to discuss on it's own. I will give my answer and would love to hear from other parents. Is it better? If yes, why. If no, why? No different, how so?




I'm happy to answer the New Zealand is a great place to bring up kids, as I have said this in the past and I know my children are getting a far better childhood here than in the UK. We came from a small village in South Wales, not a wealthy place but nor a poverty stricken place either. Just normal UK. My children went to average schools, not great but not deprived. Within our traveling distance they both participated some local extra curricular activities.

In the UK

Swimming
Football
cricket
for both of them every week. Nothing was on offer after school on a regular basis for either of them. The older boy (13) was allowed out during the day but not after dark when the place became infested with youths drinking, smoking and goodness knows what else. I also wanted him to join the local army cadets but other local children were around when they met and there was a lot of name calling involved, so he wouldn’t.

The younger boy (10) was not allowed out on his own after dark and if he wanted to go to the park with his friends he was escorted there as the roads were so busy.

In NZ

Older boy

Swimming
Football
Athletics Club
Learning the drums/guitar
Assistant to the local sound and lighting guy
Duke of Edinburgh Award
Camping out with friends (In the UK… are you mad!)
Golf lessons - $1 a week
cricket


Youngest son

Swimming
Football
Athletics Club
Paper Round (in the UK, never in a million)
Photography club
Cinema on his own (UK, not on your life)
Motor bike club
Trampoline club
Mini Ball
Golf lessons - $1 a week
Into town with his friends (again in the UK......)
Learning the guitar
cricket
Science camp
Matheletics competitions

TBH the list of things filling their lives here could go on. They are also happier in their schools, with far more going on everyday than they were used to.

Also here in NZ we have a garden big enough for a trampoline and one of those huge plastic pools. In the UK we didn’t nor would we have been able to afford it.

So for us at least, given our circumstances in the UK and unable to afford to move to anything better, NZ has answered my prayers in as far as my children are concerned. Sure bad things happen here to but nowhere near to the extent I witnessed where I lived before. I truly feel I have bought my children more time to be children here. One thing to bear in mind though, we are living in a small rural town and I can’t compare this to anywhere else in NZ.

[shakyle2906]

Although Kyle is just 6, we definetly feel that the move hasnt affected him, its a move for the better.

He is top of maths and english which is great too.

They will start swimming lessons again once the weather is warmer, and have other sports options too.

He is full of questions, never a dull moment! Parents in law worried me saying that he wouldnt 'get on' but he has excelled! We are so so proud of him!

Sorry its not a lot to report, as he is young but just wanted to agree that the move has done him world of good, he has made some lovely caring friends with great mums too i may add and is doing so very well!! His confidence has excelled too which is good!

Sharon
x

[Sam B]

I feel like mine do, on the whole. We moved from Cornwall, where they had a pretty idyllic life and attended the local village school, which was very good. We moved to Cambridge.

Why are things better? Mainly schooling. Their primary school here in NZ is wonderful, really brilliant. I have never seen them so happy to go to school. It is a decile 9 school 6 km out of Cambridge, and it has a lovely atmosphere, excellent teachers and very good facilities. I love the fact that they are in their own scruffy play clothes, hanging upside down off monkey bars and swimming every day in the first term we got here. They were also pushed much further academically, especially the older one who had coasted in the UK.

They made friends quickly, and despite being almost allergic to sport, seemed to have a sudden new-found enthusiasm for all things physical. The teachers just seem to make it fun somehow. The standard of teaching in this school is excellent - a real back to basics approach, with plenty of spellings, tables etc. Homework is regular and well-documented. There are consequences for not doing it, but it includes things like hugging your parents and tidying your room!

My eldest daughter now attends Cambridge Middle School. She has a good teacher (excellent actually) but the school is much stricter and the facilities are not quite as good. She has gone back to being bored at lunch time. There is a strict uniform. She has had to grow up suddenly, which is a bit of a shame.

One feature of the education here, is that all children are expected to prepare and deliver a public speech each year - very scary, but I wish I had learned to do this earlier. My children just seem to get noticed more at school, and their individual talents are recognised - including an art for talented artists for my younger daughter.

Other people on this forum have stated exactly the opposite views about the schools here though, so I have to acknowledge that we probably got lucky.

Also, our house sale in the UK, has allowed us to buy a large block of land with 4 hectares of bush and we are building our own house. We could never have afforded this in the UK, and I can literally let my kids run wild all day. Great.

However, my youngest daughter has had unforeseen emotional and behavioural consequences caused by the move, affecting her eating and general well-being. She still desperately misses friends and family. We have had to pay for her to see a psychologist, she is still not right 20 months in, but is improving. We could not have predicted this, she always seemed so flexible.

We had a great first year, touring the islands in our campervan, it was great and the kids had some wonderful experiences. Now we are ploughing all our money into the house build, and the kids probably don't have as much fun, but it's more like real life.

On balance - they have better lives. But proximity to family DOES matter to children, and moving them half way round the world has affected them. Time will tell.

[dharder]

But what of those improvements is NZ specific? I mean, what is not the change in personal circumstances and could not have been achieved by moving within the UK, or maybe to another country?

As I've said in the other thread, I really don't doubt that things have improved for a lot of people, but is that an NZ thing?

Daniela

[Sam B]

The schooling definitely feels NZ specific to me. The move away from a tight curriculum with regular external testing, to a more broad based and active curriculum. Swimming every day. Bare feet. This doesn't exist in the UK, although it may exist in other countries, I don't know. The ability to have more money without working harder by cashing in housing equity isn't NZ specific, but wouldn't have been possible if we hadn't moved here.

The weather also gives us all a better life (except this winter!) and means we get out more, have done more snorkelling, fishing etc than we did in Cornwall, where the weather was often rubbish.

I think children get more freedom to take risks here - there is not so much protection from possible accidents etc - a good thing in my opinion, possibly not for others. This seems to be quite specific to NZ.

[dharder]

Well, the kids' school here is not better academically than our low end school in London. I don't see that they are trying everything they can to accomodate individual needs/abilities, etc. The school has over 600 pupils, so I don't really expect them to focus on each one, how could they, but again, I can't say that 'looking after the whole child individually' is an NZ thing in general.

I often wonder what I 'took away' from the children by moving here, and what I replaced it with. On the whole, I am still undecided as to which bit is better. Obviously, my OH and I quite often talk about this as we see it very differently, but I at least managed to point out that a lot of things are a matter of how you value them: my sons for example are really interested in history, and a trip to Rome, to the British Museum, to the fields of Flanders, to Berlin were things they were really keen on. That history isn't possible to experience as it was in London, and they do miss it.

The fact that my older children had Sikh religious holidays off in their school in London, and found that totally normal, whereas here, there's hardly a non-white face to be found in the school and they have bible classes (okay, voluntary) makes me sad.

Those are just two points, the lack of diversity and how far away we are from so many things here, just as examples.

All my children are very outdoorsy, can walk for miles, climb, run, are very physically active, and all that in spite of growing up in East London. I guess I'm just saying that life is what you make it to some extent, and I often don't see the advantages of life for kids here as automatic, you still have to make things happen, just like you would in any other country.

Daniela

[dharder]

I think children get more freedom to take risks here - there is not so much protection from possible accidents etc - a good thing in my opinion, possibly not for others. This seems to be quite specific to NZ.

Well here, they get driven everywhere, have to wear shoes to and from school because it is too dangerous, we weren't allowed to take photos of the school during school hours because of privacy rules. The playgrounds have pretty much exactly the same equipement as in the UK (the newer ones there), and the same tree bark to cover the ground.

I see the same overprotectiveness that I saw in the UK, and I hear the same comments from older people how kids are wrapped in cotton wool these days, as opposed to back then, etc.

NZ is the country with the highest rate of accidental deaths in children, but believe it or not, I actually thought that indicated a good thing, namely the willingness to let them take risks and experience stuff, but again, in everyday life, I don't see them doing a whole lot of things on their own.

They can't cycle anywhere, it's too dangerous, and the distances are too far for us for a lot of after school stuff, so we end up driving all over the place. The mere mentioning of letting the boys go down the road to the local reserver elicits sharp intakes of breaths from others, and letting my almost nine year old take the bus (adult at either end) was met with universal disapproval.

Daniela

[Sam B]

Daniela - you definitely moved to the wrong place - that is so different to our experience. It must be an Auckland thing - I suppose it is a big modern city with a very different feel to the rest of NZ. I wish you were here!

[ourquest]

The schooling definitely feels NZ specific to me.

Yes, to me too. I don't know how the teachers do it, but my boys also really look forward to school every day. There is a focus on learning, but with a very wholistic and playful approach (primary school). It has taken me some getting used to as in South Africa the school system and curriculum is comparitively rigid and strict, so initially (to us) it seemed uncontrolled here. But while the kids are allowed to be kids, watching the way they actually work together (I mean the whole school, syndicate or at least class), particularly with singing/acting perfomances makes me realise that they are gaining the self discipline and self confidence that should hopefully make them effective adults. And this "kids being allowed to be kids while being eager to learn" filters into everyday life so the positive effect is felt well outside of the school.

[Familyofmonkeys]

Those are just two points, the lack of diversity and how far away we are from so many things here, just as examples.



I think that just goes to show just how very different experiences can be, even within the Auckland area itself.....and i'm sure that to some extent it much affect the way we all feel about out individual moves to NZ.

My daughters school is quite the opposite. It is very mutlicultural...there are children from UK, all over europe, North America, Africa/S Africa, all over Asia, pacific islands as well as NZ maori. The school copes extraordinarily well with the diversity by adopting inclusive policies. For example, the school has no religious affiliations, there is no collective worship, in assembly they sing cheerful songs rather than hymns....this week is that old 'Lollipop' song. They try to aknowledge religious/special days from all the various cultures in some form or another e.g. short plays, displays, special lunches etc.

From our perspective, NZ has been great for our kids.....perhaps simply because we have more time together and are able to enjoy the outdoors more as a family. The work/life balance here for us is far better than we experienced in UK.....after living 'up North', Wales, Greater London area and Midlands. Our kids are small, so they aren't yet involved in loads of organised activities apart from swimming lessons.....but there does seem to be plenty on offer.

I realised earlier this week how lucky we are that our children are getting to enjoy their early childhoods just being kids, after two people I know in UK who's children turned 4 last week are starting school later this week because there is no longer the option of a January intake. Although starting school at 5 seems a little late in certain cases, children starting school when the week before they were 3 year olds is just plain shocking IMO.

[Oregonkiwi]

there's hardly a non-white face to be found in the school

This is a good example of how much schools differ within Auckland. From the (very positive) ERO report for the school (Ellerslie/Mt Wellington area) we'll be sending our son to next year:
"Ethnic composition
Māori 18%, New Zealand/European Pākehā 11%,
Asian/Indian 28%, Tongan 13%, Samoan 8%,
other Pacific 9%, other ethnicities 13%"

[Moorf]

There are heaps of wide-ranging views expressed on this forum in a number of threads that are now lost in the archives - thought I'd dredge a few up. :)

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=8445&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=6929&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=5780&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=4469&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=10178&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=10065&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=9830&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=6308&highlight=diny+school

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?t=8861&highlight=diny+school

[Tia Maria]

Well here, they get driven everywhere, have to wear shoes to and from school because it is too dangerous, we weren't allowed to take photos of the school during school hours because of privacy rules. The playgrounds have pretty much exactly the same equipement as in the UK (the newer ones there), and the same tree bark to cover the ground.

I see the same overprotectiveness that I saw in the UK, and I hear the same comments from older people how kids are wrapped in cotton wool these days, as opposed to back then, etc.

NZ is the country with the highest rate of accidental deaths in children, but believe it or not, I actually thought that indicated a good thing, namely the willingness to let them take risks and experience stuff, but again, in everyday life, I don't see them doing a whole lot of things on their own.

They can't cycle anywhere, it's too dangerous, and the distances are too far for us for a lot of after school stuff, so we end up driving all over the place. The mere mentioning of letting the boys go down the road to the local reserver elicits sharp intakes of breaths from others, and letting my almost nine year old take the bus (adult at either end) was met with universal disapproval.

Daniela

This is all such a shame, what made you originally choose that part of Auckland?

Cheers

Tia

[nippa&pippa]

Well here, they get driven everywhere, have to wear shoes to and from school because it is too dangerous, we weren't allowed to take photos of the school during school hours because of privacy rules. The playgrounds have pretty much exactly the same equipement as in the UK (the newer ones there), and the same tree bark to cover the ground.

I see the same overprotectiveness that I saw in the UK, and I hear the same comments from older people how kids are wrapped in cotton wool these days, as opposed to back then, etc.

NZ is the country with the highest rate of accidental deaths in children, but believe it or not, I actually thought that indicated a good thing, namely the willingness to let them take risks and experience stuff, but again, in everyday life, I don't see them doing a whole lot of things on their own.

They can't cycle anywhere, it's too dangerous, and the distances are too far for us for a lot of after school stuff, so we end up driving all over the place. The mere mentioning of letting the boys go down the road to the local reserver elicits sharp intakes of breaths from others, and letting my almost nine year old take the bus (adult at either end) was met with universal disapproval.

Daniela

Eh? Are you really in NZ? As I have not or heard anything like this in NZ :no

[Tia Maria]

Eh? Are you really in NZ? As I have not or heard anything like this in NZ :no

I know someone who moved to Blockhouse Bay and there were plenty of things she didn't like about it and they just couldn't make it work there as it wasn't better than their UK situation. They then moved to the North Shore and it 'clicked' for them.

She is, however, someone with great energy and took moving again all in her stride. I'm not sure I would have managed the same thing as it still requires a lot of starting again with friends, schools, houses etc even if it is just 30 mins away.

Cheers

Tia

[dharder]

This is all such a shame, what made you originally choose that part of Auckland?

My OH grew up in the same street that we are living in...

Daniela

[Moorf]

Does she see much in a way of change, for good or bad, in the area since growing up there? Same school?

[dharder]

Eh? Are you really in NZ? As I have not or heard anything like this in NZ :no

Of course that doesn't mean that these aren't aspects to be found in NZ as well.

They are simply different experiences, just as there really is no one experience that could adequately describe all of the UK.

Daniela

[dharder]

Does she see much in a way of change, for good or bad, in the area since growing up there? Same school?

She has noticed change, and not all for the better. Some of her comments were along the lines of 'the cars got bigger and the houses flasher'. She also said the difference between the 'right' side of the road and the 'wrong' side (see thread about Point England) has become much more visible, the dividing line between rich and poor very obvious. In general, she said she got the impression that people have become much more materialistic here, are showing off more than she can remember (this is all for this particular area).

The school (her school for a while) has become whiter, and if their past zoning policy is anything to go by will become even whiter yet (there is a noticable change between the higher years and lower years because there was a change in zone in between).

Of course it is still close to the beach and a really nice nature reserve, so that hasn't changed and was a bit plus for this area. Grandparents just down the road where a pull as well.

I have considered moving within Auckland to a more diverse, more alive area, but I currently don't have the energy to even give this a lot of thought. If I can muster that energy, I may look into it.

Daniela

[Bruckner]

Somethings are much better here, such as the community where we live as opposed to our tiny apartment and borderline neighborhood, but there are still many things about NYC that I would like my kids to have exposure to. Generally, I'm glad they're getting to spend their pre-school years here in NZ.

Emily

[Tia Maria]

My OH grew up in the same street that we are living in...

Daniela

I see, its always tricky returning to your partner's home town.

Perhaps, when you have the energy and if your OH is happy to move, you could both look at alternative areas, visit other schools etc. All the schools are good in my area, but I had an instant connection with the one my kids are at, this has always been the thing that compensates for any other issues I've had.

I suspect now you would be able to pick up very quickly if an area would suit you or not. Then you could weigh it up against what you've already got to see if the effort is worth it. It must be frustrating to read about areas where kids bike riding, independence etc is positively encouraged but not have access to it.

I think its probably a similar feeling to those that move to NZ with a vision of countryside and their own lifestyle plot etc but end up on a small section in an Auckland suburb as that is where their job is.

Personally I started off in a situation far from what I'd hoped for, (although many would love it), so I just keep chipping away changing a bit here and a bit there, so far it seems to be working. :)

Cheers

Tia

[wilson182]

Us too Tia. We started off in Christchurch which is the area we chose after our "reccie". DD had been in school for a couple of terms, but our rental was dire to say the least and there was no way I could do another winter in it. So, to cut a long story short we ended up in Rangiora and have loved it from the minute we arrived - it "clicked" for us. I had a lot of heartache over moving DD from her school so soon though, and it was noticable that she was the "new girl" for quite a while. Daniela, I have watched your posts with much interest as you have always been completely honest with how you feel about this move. Just out of interest ( and total noseyness, I understand if this is too personal) would it perhaps be a consideration for you guys to try another area, maybe you could find a happier place for you which would make the time you have left more bearable.

[nippa&pippa]

Daniela, I have watched your posts with much interest as you have always been completely honest with how you feel about this move. Just out of interest ( and total noseyness, I understand if this is too personal) would it perhaps be a consideration for you guys to try another area, maybe you could find a happier place for you which would make the time you have left more bearable.

Agree with Deb. I remember we wasn't happy 100% when we stayed at our rental house in Burnside for 7months because it wasn't "us", not our choice. Other people, like Moorf, know us what we are, what we like etc, they know we won't be happy living in the city :no We managed to got out of rental house sooner than expected, got out of city and brought our house in the country that is suit us so much and love it there so much.
Last week, I had very difficulties times with my children with their allergies and eczema (long story) and I was at my kiwi friend's house for good coffee and rant! :D She put me on spot with this question, would I prefer go back to UK to deal with their allergies better? My answer is NO because we all love it here so much and I will do my best to deal with children's allergies here by seeking advices and helps from other kiwi mums.

[Carol]

hmmmm
Interesting topic - the answer I can only come up with is I dont know - because we moved when they were 7 and 4.
They are now 19 and 17.

Overall....and with HUGE sweeping statements I would say.....

House: no different. We left a lovely house in a lovely village. We've got a slightly (but not much) bigger house on a similar sized piece of land.
Although we do own a rental now - probably would not have contemplated that in the UK.
We came with very little money - which affected quite dramatically what we could buy. Sure - i would love a bigger house on a lifestyle block - and if you have moved to that - you are very lucky. But to be honest - I preferred my house in England to any I have lived in here....
For the kids - no difference.

School: Different. Better I think - although looking at what my friends' kids have done in the place we used to live - I doubt they could fault their High School there. We had to move house to get in the zone of our school of choice here - no big deal - we just moved.
DD's current primary school is bigger and more multi-cultural than the one I taught at (where the boys went). More balanced culturally - along the lines of the culture balance of NZ as a whole.

Work: Has been exactly the same for OH. For me - a huge learning curve.
Kids definitely do more with us here..... but dont see as much of us as we would like .....

Friends: Oldest has made a few chosen friends - all lovely - mostly girls....
Middle has hundreds of friends - all very nice kids.
Youngest has mostly kiwi friends - and I know none of their mums at all.....

SPorts..... have varied. THe boys swam a lot when we first came - but we found the intense pressure to put them into competitions too much for us. They left in the end because of this. We actually found the same problem with gymnastics with my son - who was exceptionally good at it - but because he came late to it (early teens) he wasnt encouraged to participate as he hadnt been through the "competitive" process..... we were very disappointed in that...
All of them have been through Cubs/Scouts nd Brownies... and loved it.
Boys both played golf.....and represented the school. It started off cheap (when we lived in Whitby) but gradually got quite expensive....
Oldest loves his football - but found it much less structured here - and actually SHONE as a wee star player (when he was pretty much average in UK) He still plays now.
Middle son is now doing Karate - for pleasure.


Driving..... heck. Your heart is in your mouth when you start to teach them to drive (potentially at 15).
I just do not think it is old enough for a car driver!

Getting about: Assuming they arent driving .... they use public transport without a second thought. Although tbh - if they were going into Porirua to a movie late at night - I WOULD go and pick them up without question rather than them getting the train home. If they were going into Wellington and getting a train home - I wouldnt give it a second thought.

Lack of family here...... awful. Awful Awful. And gets worse...

Got to go to meet DD walking home from school...... I do like that!

[nippa&pippa]

Got to go to meet DD walking home from school...... I do like that!

Me too, to meet him at bus stop...oh heck I suppose to go now...

[Moorf]

Me too, to meet him at bus stop...oh heck I suppose to go now...

Don't trip!!!! :p

[nippa&pippa]

Don't trip!!!! :p

Ddin't this time :p (been to physio yesterday, much better :yes as she couldn't believe I wasn't wearing sling for last 2 weeks!!!)

Made it in time to see school bus came around the corner, that was close shave! I wondering what happen if I didn't "meet" him in time? as they refuse let him go on his own because he is only 5.

[dharder]

Just out of interest ( and total noseyness, I understand if this is too personal) would it perhaps be a consideration for you guys to try another area, maybe you could find a happier place for you which would make the time you have left more bearable.

It hasn't really been an option to move anywhere other than Auckland, which I think is fine with me. Anything smaller than this and I'd scream even more.

What I hadn't quite anticipated, and that is definitely what we might have to revisit, is just how 'not me' this area is. Some of the children's after school things are in Mt Eden, for example, and that is much more 'me': there are people on the street, shops, there's some sort of life there. It's also really close to my work.

We'll see, I doubt my OH would want to live anywhere else though. She's been pining for the views and the closeness to the beach for 11 years in London, and in a way, I keep thinking that if we are only here for the three year trial, she might as well get as much out of it as possible.

Ah well. Didn't Moorf suggest another thread about partners wanting this to a different degree :)

Daniela

[Moorf]

Ah well. Didn't Moorf suggest another thread about partners wanting this to a different degree

Ta-daaaaa!

http://www.emigratenz.org/forum/showthread.php?p=239819#post239819

[migratory birds]

Youngest has mostly kiwi friends - and I know none of their mums at all.....

How has this worked out for you and others mums on this list? Are you developing friendships with some of the Kiwi mums of your kids' friends?

When we visited, we were looking at schools in different communities and while my daughter played on the playground, I wandered over to a group of mums/tots watching their kids play some sport I didn't recognize.

I asked one mum what the sport was as it was unfamiliar to me.

She actually turned her back and walked away from me!!

(The school staff was icy cold as well and left a horrible impression on me as well.)

The best connection I made with another mum while visiting schools turned out to be another ex-pat who immigrated 15 yrs prior.

[JandM]

What a horrible reaction! There have to be much nicer places you could enrol your daughter.

[Familyofmonkeys]

I have considered moving within Auckland to a more diverse, more alive area, but I currently don't have the energy to even give this a lot of thought. If I can muster that energy, I may look into it.


I think this is a very valid point.....some people might find it easier to return to their country of origin than try other areas of NZ when things don't work out, as it can require an awful lot of energy to move and start again. One of the reasons we feel so positive about our move down to S Island next year is that we have already met a few people...to me being a SAHM with less opportnuities for adult company than OH this makes a big difference :)

[nippa&pippa]

One of the reasons we feel so positive about our move down to S Island next year is that we have already met a few people...to me being a SAHM with less opportnuities for adult company than OH this makes a big difference :)

I can't wait :D

[nippa&pippa]

How has this worked out for you and others mums on this list? Are you developing friendships with some of the Kiwi mums of your kids' friends?


Most of friends are met via my children's clubs, playgroups and kindy. I haven't got myself to known with other mums & dads at school properly because my son go to school by school bus. But the staffs at the school is brilliant, with few hiccup :D.
Myself, I have notice it is more easier to make friends out in the rural than in city although.

[aberdian]

How has this worked out for you and others mums on this list? Are you developing friendships with some of the Kiwi mums of your kids' friends?

When we visited, we were looking at schools in different communities and while my daughter played on the playground, I wandered over to a group of mums/tots watching their kids play some sport I didn't recognize.

I asked one mum what the sport was as it was unfamiliar to me.

She actually turned her back and walked away from me!!

(The school staff was icy cold as well and left a horrible impression on me as well.)

The best connection I made with another mum while visiting schools turned out to be another ex-pat who immigrated 15 yrs prior.
Scarily close to our experiences here down South, the only "open" people around seem to be from other places. Sometimes we put it down to the massive growth this area has seen in the last few years leading to resentment/closed attitude to incomers, don't want to make friends in case the new people move away. At other times, we're less charitable :) But in all cases, our outward demeanour is happy and smiley, we joke that we must be getting a reputation as "that bl**dy happy couple".

[Bergita]

I have to say that our daughter is much happier in NZ. For the first couple of months she struggled a bit as nothing was familiar but now she is completely happy. She often tells me that there are so many fun things to do in NZ and "thanks for bringing me here". It's not that there are things to do here that don't exist in South Africa, it's more that I'm willing to let her do them, and experience them because it's so much safer.

She loves school, loves her extra-curricular activities and has made a few good friends. I've found that the mothers here are very friendly and welcoming. I haven't really made friends with them, but they're friendly acquaintances which is good enough for me right now.

I like her school too, very focussed on happy children, well balanced in terms of arts, sport and academics, and they try to instill some common sense as well. And then if you take the school and activities completely out of the equation, there's happier, less stressed more relaxed parents, that also makes her life a lot more fun.

So, yes, my daughter has a better life in NZ. And really, that was the whole point.

[Alex40]

My kids are the reason I'm so up and down about it.

I have lived overseas before, so that doesn't bother me (although I have never lived in new zealand).

I worry about my girls and unsettling them, especially my oldest who would be 11 and a half if we went at the end of next year as we were planning.

I just don't know...

Mish

[willsken]

My kids are the reason I'm so up and down about it.

I have lived overseas before, so that doesn't bother me (although I have never lived in new zealand).

I worry about my girls and unsettling them, especially my oldest who would be 11 and a half if we went at the end of next year as we were planning.

I just don't know...

Mish

It's a hard one isn't it? My youngest was 10 when we made the move and he settled very easily but the oldest boy was 13 and he struggled a lot for the first 6 months. He's fine now and very settled and happy. Depends a lot on the personality of the child though I suppose.

[Alex40]

Yep, I guess we are just going to take another holiday, maybe April, and see then.

Sometimes I think I worry too much!

Mish :cheers

[MelB]

Hi all
Please excuse any dumb questions because this is my first (no doubt of many!) postings but...are there Brownie packs in NZ and how popular is gymnastics? If we get residency/work permits, I hope they will help my 7 year old make new friends and settle in. Thanks in anticipation!
MelB

[JandM]

Hello, and welcome to the forum. :)

Here's a site giving in formation about NZ Brownies, with a link to the Guide one so you can find out what will be near to where you may settle. http://www.kiwifamilies.co.nz/Topics/Activities/Clubs/Brownies.html

You'll no doubt get replies from people already over there when NZ wakes up a bit later on.

[Helsandfamily]

Hi all
are there Brownie packs in NZ and how popular is gymnastics? If we get residency/work permits, I hope they will help my 7 year old make new friends and settle in.
MelB

Brownies, cubs scouts and guides etc are quite popular, there seems to be groups all over. My 8 yr old son has rcently joined cubs and they seem to be very active with camps and cookouts camp fires and stuff, which I think is brilliant - what it should be about. It has certainly helped him make friends and settle.
Gymnastics seems to be a big thing over here too, with schools competing in this it seems that kids are encouraged into this - I have no experience of it but it does seem popular (particularly with girls) imho.

HTH

Hels

[Oregonkiwi]

how popular is gymnastics?


This week our 5 yr old boy started an after school gym class at our local YMCA - seems pretty popular, the class was full - here's the link so you can see what's on offer:
http://www.nzymca.com/kids/gymnastics.php?PHPSESSID=ef58e61f9aaa1a825caaafeab 7fc6c32