[Blaine@5]

Hi all,

It has been a while(7 months) since I have logged into this forum. For reasons I am sure you will appreciate.

Some of you may remember, I am the one who's OH went over in March last year, while I tied up everything here in SA with my 4 kids.

There has been progress since then. My OH has got his residency, but he also has an affair with a young lady from a church in Tauranga 3 months after landing in NZ.

So I have proceeded with a divorce (which is really complicated and involved because he is in NZ and I am here!)

I am also the one paying for it and he is living the high life. Staying on the beach in Tauranga and going on surfing trips around the island. He pays for nothing, he has sent me child support maybe 8 times in nearly a year and in those 8 months it has be such a minimal amount. He is earning on average $900 per week.

What I need help/assistance in is getting a name and phone number of a government official who could assist me in having a garnishing order put on his salary. I have all his work details.

Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you all
Kerry

[JandM]

Sorry to hear of your difficult situation. Have you thought of writing to the member of parliament for the area where your husband is living? - that person would be able to advise you who you should contact, I would think. You should be able to find out their name and contact details by Googling.

[Blaine@5]

Thank you for that assistance.

I have googled most of the child support sites in NZ. I am going to phone the offices tonight (which is their morning).

[Jo Jo]

I'm so sorry to hear about your troubles.

The IRD has information on child support here (http://www.ird.govt.nz/childsupport/background/). What's not very encouraging for your situation is the following:

To qualify for child support, the child must be:

* under 19 years of age
* a New Zealand citizen or "ordinary resident" in New Zealand
* not married or in a de facto relationship
* financially dependent, that is, not working more than 30 hours a week on average, or receiving a benefit or student allowance.


(highlightling mine)

Have you sought legal advice in South Africa?

[Blaine@5]

Hi Jo Jo

Thank you for that. I have an attorney who is dealing with my divorce here in SA is going to try and include it in the divorce. But that is just too long winded. I need to sue him now. I cant wait 6 months for child support.

I have 4 kids under 10. He is a New Zealand Resident because of his trade.

I am sure that the government there cannot allow him to avoid paying for his children?

[Pebbles]

Dear Kerry,
Although I cannot offer you any advice on the matter I do want to let you know that my heart goes out to you. What a horrible thing to have to go through...
I wish you all strength needed to get through this. May this new year bring you everything you hope for and more. And may your ex get everything he deserves too!

[SarahEDH]

What if the NZ media picked up this story -- maybe some publicity would influence the deadbeat dad's behavior. The Herald seems to publish a lot of feature articles on migrants who try to use NZ to evade justice and personal responsibility . . .

[sks]

Just a thought -- if your (soon-to-be-ex) OH's PR application included you and the children, I'd suggest advising NZIS about the changed circumstances. If they were to make some noise about revoking his PR, I bet you'd get some $$ rather quickly.

I'm a father of five -- reading about your OH's callousness makes me sick. Best of luck in the New Year.

I wouldn't rule out a direct approach to his employer, BTW. I'd think that, at best, it would be a conversation he'd rather avoid.

[kanatakiwi]

Sorry I don't have any specific info about SA but I do know that Australia actively pursues people living in NZ if they owe child support to someone and kids living in Australia. So the action comes from the home country, not NZ, and I think it would be worth checking whether SA has this type of agreement with NZ and whether they will take any action. It is in SA's interests to make sure that your kids are getting the financial support they need.

I am aware that Australia can work with the NZ IRD to collect child support payments from anyone living in NZ.

And I also agree that you should contact NZIS, I don't think they will look kindly on him emigrating here while ignoring his responsibilities to his kids in SA.

[Blaine@5]

Hi all,

Pebbles, thank you for the kind words, support is a great help.

SKS - 5 kids - WOWEEEE!!! Thought I always topped the charts, but you take the cake! I take my hat off to you!
I agree with you and have already contacted him to et him know that I will inform Immigration of his debt here, his app is still going through. And you are quite right, I quickly got a response from him. We spoke ;ast night and he is a very self righteous person and chooses not to pay because he says he knows I have also cheated (whateva, I had no time to cheat with 4 kids!). And until I tell him the truth he will not pay.

It is emotionally exhausting trying to flog a dead horse, I will not go to immigration as I wouldnt lower my standards and go as far as ruining his chances (also, he may just have to come back here and then I have to see his face!).

I will however include child support in the divorce agreement that will be served on him shortly!

And Sarah EDH - you rock, I can see you take no prisoners!!!!

Thank you guys again, it's great to have such awesome advice!

[Marsh]

A down right nasty thing to do and people like that deserve whatever is coming to them, end of.

[sks]

...I agree with you and have already contacted him to et him know that I will inform Immigration of his debt here, his app is still going through...

...I will not go to immigration as I wouldnt lower my standards and go as far as ruining his chances...

And maybe he knows that you aren't serious. Unloaded weapons aren't effective, nor are loaded ones whose bearers are unwilling to discharge.

I don't know how long you were married, whether your children are all his as well (shouldn't matter if he's legally responsible for support, but it always does as a practical issue), and your future hopes for your relationship (your divorce filing would suggest that there aren't any). Permit me to gently suggest, however, that your OH has been more than willing to "lower his standards" by betraying his vows and withholding child support, and that you just might need to be a bit more coldhearted for the sake of your children.

Sincere best wishes (and no more from me on this topic -- I'm hardly an expert).

[gil]

Hi Kerry,

Cyber-support for you and your family from another mother-of-four :yes

You say in your first post There has been progress since then. My OH has got his residency, so contacting NZIS is unlikely to be of help? No standard-lowering required!

Gil

[SarahEDH]

Hi Kerry -- you're right, I think it's always best not to take prisoners. They whinge too much and their upkeep is too dear. As a tangible objective, cash is better.

I agree with Sks in regard to contacting NZIS. Presumably your OH must fulfill the time requirement of living in NZ before the PR visa converts to full PR residency, so there should still be time to provide useful information to the immigration folks. They could revoke his residency status if they decide fraud or serious moral issues are involved.

In my view, your best bet is to do what you can to ensure he returns to SA, so that he has to work there and his wages can be more easily accessed by your local court. Enforcing a foreign judgment from one country to another is never easy, and from what I've seen in NZ, you could spend a lot on lawyer fees, just trying to collect on his wages here.

If your OH won't agree to a reasonable amount of support, please consider contacting NZIS and letting them know the facts. You may never have more negotiating strength than you do right now, when OH is not yet in NZ "forever", and it would be a shame to let that slip away.

[Blaine@5]

Hi all,

I am glad to see that I have very fruitful advice from all of you. Reading it just makes me feel like there are real people out there.

I have contacted immigration, as we are not divorced as yet and no legal court oreder has been set in place, they cannot hold that against him. Fair enough from their side.

I have gone to my attorneys and asked him to incorporate a court order for maintenance in my divorce agreement.

Sks, yes they are all his kids. I am 27 and have been with him for 13 years. Scary how you think you know someone.

I phoned him on Tuesday and tried to reason with the man. He is a very self righteous person and reasoning with him was to no avail. I have managed to get him to agree to pay me $150 per week while I wait for the court order, but then again, his word evidently means nothing hey. We will see.

The last thing I want is for him to return to SA, you know what happens when people make mistakes and realise it. I will have him begging at my door and have harrassment in my life.

Please keep in contact, I must be the only person on this forum who is not coming to NZ but is in contact with everyone that is either going or there already.

You are va great bunch of people.

[kanatakiwi]

Hi again Kerry,

I have checked and found out that NZ and SA have a taxation agreement (so that people moving from one country to the other are not doubled taxed). I could see anythign specific about child support payments, but it does mean that the two bureaucracies are cooperating on income and tax, so that makes it easier to enforce a child support agreement in either country. this is how Australia manages it, because they share information about income and taxation between the two countries and they can enforce a child support order for a NZ citizen.

Good luck and hope this helps a bit. This is a verytough time, but I think in the future he is going to want to maintain contact with his kids if nothing else and so the issue of getting some child support may get a little easier.
KK

[JandL]

Have you seen this article:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_support

The bit of interest is:
The right to child support and the responsibilities of parents to provide such support have been internationally recognized. The 1992 United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, a binding convention signed by every member nation of the United Nations and formally ratified by all but two

Which points to:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_Nations_Convention_on_the_Rights_of_the_Chi ld

As part of the UN SA should be able to get payments, but from what I read you have to ask the SA agency not the NZ agency to deal with it.
http://www.capegateway.gov.za/eng/directories/services/11575/17463

Looks like a long process.