[hosebergine]

...cried myself to sleep last night worrying about getting everything done.

It isn't that I don't want to go - it is just so difficult looking after two very young children, doing a load of DIY, coping with the everyday things like washing / shopping / cleaning, spending time with our lovely friends, doing a little bit of freelance work etc etc as well as moving our lives to the other side of the world.

Sometimes I just feel like life is just one huge to do list.

Can anyone empathise or am I on my own? :eek:

[dusk]

*hugs*

what you are going through is perfectly natural and at least half of the people who emigrate will go through the same thing - people here have posted how they can't sleep, have become ill (dilanium springs to mind here) and have generally been stresswed to the point where they just want to hide under the duvet until it's all over :D

ask for help from anyone around you who has the time to spare - think of it as spending a bit more time with them ;)

[Sam B]

You are NOT on your own. You may never do anything as hard as this again.

Just try to concentrate on the tasks for each day and not to think too far ahead to all the other jobs that need doing. They will get done on the next day, and the next day. Just do what you can cope with. Can any of those lovely friends lend a hand with childcare for a day?

[hosebergine]

met three of them today for a play and burst into tears when one of them asked how I was but no offers of help. I just need to drop that English idiocy of not being able to actually ask for help. Own worst enemy really!

[dusk]

What have you got to lose? You won't be here to have to face them again if they say they can't help ;) If you're not feeling brave enought to ask outright try dropping some very heavy hints about how you would really appreciate some help with x or y :D If you don't get any offers Sam B's advice is very good and should help too :)

Remember, if all else fails stop and have a cup of tea ;)

[Helsandfamily]

I can totally understand and went through the same (or very) similar things ourselves.

The last week we were in the uk, we were still taking stuff to the local dump to get rid of things. This was right up to the time that we were leaving for the airport.

You will do what you need to do, and what has to get done will get done. Try just concentrating on the big things. The small things may not matter as much as you think they do.

HTH
Hels

[JandM]

Can anyone empathiseOh, yes. We were saying this evening, it's really quite frightening, thinking of all that's necessary, and we still have years before our application process can even begin. And as we'll be on the sponsored parents scheme, we haven't the problems of chldren in the household. You're very brave, and it's not surprising that the courage sometimes slips a bit. But THINGS aren't worth spoiling bits of your life for. Give yourself permission to slacken a bit. ((()))

[victoria24]

retrospective empathy from us. good news is, it does feel great in the end!

[thewoodies]

Hi, have you read my 18 weeks to go post??? You are doing really well - it does work out but you sometimes just have to hold on very tight and stay focused - remember its hard enough with small children let alone everything else !!! I did the crying , ranting, crying , ranting etc etc:laugh ...............its just the stress for us its just starting to come off now i am 14 weeks in (OH had hard time getting a job once we were here)

[tea drinker]

Yep.
With you on this one.
(And I'm way off counting down in any unit let alone weeks :laugh )

As I'm coming over on holiday (and planning on staying :D ) I worry that there is something very vital that I haven't found out about...yet...and as I don't know what it is I can't ask about it if you see what I mean?

[M-Squared]

Oh my poor J! Just take baby steps. Take the plunge and just ask for help. You must, you really must! Big hugs to you! (((hugs)))

[hosebergine]

Thanks ever so much everyone :) I feel a lot more balanced today and got really excited about playing on NZ beaches earlier :clap

I will call a neighbour this afternoon and ask her to mind the kids for a couple of hours this weekend. And Mr Hosebergine and I are going to do a bit of late night decorating tonight which we are strangely looking forward to. I even bought some posh beer for afterwards - can't beat that post-DIY beer, even if it is at one in the morning! And then we're taking our little girls out for a picnic tomorrow - I even bought my 4 yr old a packet of crisps to take which she thought was the most exciting thing in the world, ever! What a generous mummy I am :yes

Thanks again everyone, guess who's going to Auckland in 69 days? :raebanana