[hosebergine]

....22 days to go and I think I want to run and hide. Had a really good week ticking things off my list, fighting with call centres to cancel stuff, doing a teeny weeny cheap weekly shop (we're on scraps from the freezer now), finalising paperwork, all that kind of thing...............and then my best friend's husbands catches me at our nursery sports day this morning and tells me my friend has been crying about us going. I feel like a rubbish friend now.

And as if that wasn't bad enough, somebody elbowed me out of the way so I didn't win the mum's race :wah

[Kalla]

:( oh dear that's not good.

I feel for you ((hugs))

it's an emotional time - hang in there! Tell your friend to think of all the wonderful holidays they can have in NZ

[willow]

I know exactly how you feel, we are going through the same. I am in a state of panic about the things I may forget to do. Those things i haven't considered, like some bonds that were taken out by grandparents for our children all need to be redirected etc. someone mentions things like that and i feel of **** i hadn't even thought of that one.

we are also fending off a leaving party. we thought we had done quite well, but now friends are wanting to do their own BBQ's etc for us, we could end up saying goodbye several times over rather than a huge goodbye. how emotionally draining is that going to be!

Suddenly time is moving very quickly:wah

[hosebergine]

Thanks Willow, JK&A, it's a bit stressful isn't it?!

I'm resisting the urge to call all the people I've already called to cancel stuff with again, just to make sure they've done it properly. I appear to have an inherent mistrust of call centres!

Should start the "Not Long Now, Need Therapy" posse

[Helsandfamily]

It is such a horrible time, I really wish you all the best of luck. I couldn't wait to be on the plane just to be able to breathe and not think about everything all the time, I could just concentrate on us.

Your friend will get over it. If she is relly a friend she would want what is best for you and your family. Even if NZ turns out to be not what you are hoping it will be at least you will have tried and she will still be there for you.

This time will pass ((((( HUgs)))))

[Jacqi B]

my best friend's husbands catches me at our nursery sports day this morning and tells me my friend has been crying about us going. I feel like a rubbish friend now.

And as if that wasn't bad enough, somebody elbowed me out of the way so I didn't win the mum's race :wah

only a rubbish friend('s husband) lays that guilt trip on someone - friend can come and visit.

someone elbowed you out of the way - she's probably jealous.

In just over three weeks you'll be in your new country :cheers

[grady bunch]

Hang in there, you'll soon be over the painful bit and on the fantastic adventure!! Where are you heading?

It is so much easier once you get here, makes the 6 months before you got here a distant memory! We've been here nearly 6 months now, just buying a camper van and selling our car to live the dream more!

The Gradys

[Kanga]

I really don't mean this to sound unkind but I wonder whether there's some 'transference' going on with your friend? This is often the way I found- people say they're very upset you're going, that they're sad because they're going to miss you, when actually they're kind of choked up on the thoughts and feelings about their lives that you striking out and reaching for your big dreams triggers.

Anyway, I wanted to say try to 'repel' the guilt feelings and look to future. Someone quite wise said to me when I was in the final countdown flap that you just tackle the absolute 'must happen' stuff (visa, tickets, pack) and then get done what you can- anything that doesn't get done by the time you leave doesn't really matter. It's true; you're going to arrive in NZ in a few short weeks :) :) :)

[tea drinker]

Agree with all of the above
Think of yourselves first and let other people sort themselves out

I remember one sports day where a parent ended up in hospital because of being 'elbowed' out of the way and in the dads race they ran straight into the 15 ft ish fence and tore it out of the fixings .

Yours was early - did they arrange it so that you could participate before leaving? ;)

[Flutterby]

can imagine the kids tutting at their parents poor sportsmanship LOL

Sorry your friend has made you feel guilty, i'm guessing since it was the hubby that told you she was trying not to let her feelings be known to you. maybe if you sit down with her and have a chat you can make each other feel better about things......thats what friends are for eh!

[britzy]

We have not long gone through all the good byes and they are hard,people say goodbye then turn up to say good bye again it goes on and on and so emotionally draining but you will get through it and it will make you realise who your true friends are as they stay with you where ever you are in the world. It is a huge relief when you board the plane and start your adventure once you have your internet up and running you will be in touch with your friends again. I hope the last few weeks go well. good luck for the flight.
Helen

[Grey Granite]

Hi there! We had the packers on 19/20 May and decided to work on here until the last minute and take 10 day trip to get to NZ, arriving 7 Aug. We were told it took 8 - 12 weeks to ship our stuff out so that was what we were working towards. We decided to organise a 'do' for everyone not too close to our actual leaving date, but have found that all those that cant make it want to see us for 'one last meal'! I'm gonna look like a female Pavaroti by the time I get to NZ! Not one of our friends have been negative, they cant wait to get a free holiday with us! I finally told my mum on Monday - and I'll just swiftly move on from that traumatic episode. I'm still thinking of things I need to tick off, and the main event's (moving!!) already passed!
Mrs Granite

[hosebergine]

Thanks everyone for your very kind words of reassurance. I thought the whole ITA stress was difficult but the last month in the UK looks like a whole new level! Mr Hosebergine and I even snapped at each other this morning whilst pressure-washing the garden furniture and we're one of those never argue couples. I didn't mean to soak him....

We have found someone interested in renting the house but they want to knock us down on price, bring a cat (we said no pets) and not pitch up until the end of August - we leave on 9 July. It feels like a lot of compromises but we may have no option but to agree. I am finding it incredibly difficult keeping the house to showhome standard with a 4yr old and a 10 month old. Plus I really do need to get the cases out and start packing.

Baby Hosebergine has not been well today. A friend very kindly offered to look after the kids for a few hours but I had to down tools early and go and collect them. Obviously in need of a mummy-cuddle I swept her into my arms and she promptly deposited a lot of sick down my clothes. Thankfully I borrowed my friends' husbands jumper otherwise there would have been newspaper reports of topless female drivers in York. So my day of getting stuff done ended at 230 with the rest of the day spent washing and reclothing my lovely bundle of puking baby. It has put me off bananas for a while I can tell you!

Anyway, 19 days until we get our lives back and live as a family once more.

[tea drinker]

Oh dear hope BH (and her mum) feel better soon