[KD17]

Not to sound on a "downer" but we're moving out of our apartment this weekend to rent a friends house whose going travelling for a year or so, hopefully until we move to NZ next spring ;)

I've just sold all my furniture (fortunately :roll: to the first people that have come to see it) as my friend is leaving absolutely everything in his house for us to use (expect personals of course :smile ) which gives us the opportunity to sell our things in preparation for the "big day".... It's a bit early for us to be doing this just now, but the opportunity has been handed to us so we've taken it.

It's just crossing my mind exactly why we are doing this - a reality check I think.

This apartment we've been in for the past 18 months is totally gorgeous, right by the sea, wonderful views, all mod cons, private balcony etc., etc. Although we have been renting, this has been my home, and moving into my friends house is that one step closer to NZ.

I'm sure it will be one of many trying times to come that you've all been through - just my turn I guess :uhoh

I'm sure it will all be put in perspective when we meet some of you NWers in a week or so.

:cheers :cheers

Keith & Debby

[jan]

Keith & Debby hi,

It's just crossing my mind exactly why we are doing this - a reality check I think.


It is perfectly normal to have these feelings I'm sure, because I have had them lots and lots of times. :yes

I have mentioned before everything around me in my little world is perfect, good jobs, nice home, super family & friends etc etc.

But we have been given an opportunity, and we have decided to take it and run. We made a decision pretty snappy to move to NZ. My 12yr old son might resist the move if we had waited?, we might have worried ourselves out of the idea!

Every time I have a stop and think about what you are doing moment. Yes it daunts me but I seem to get this wave of excitement straight after! :laugh Thats got to be right?

We are going for it and hey if it doesn't work for us, we are coming back. :nice1

See you next week! :cheers

Jan xx

[Diny]

I have mentioned before everything around me in my little world is perfect, good jobs, nice home, super family & friends etc etc.


SNAP !!!!!! Just the same for us Jan. Like I keep saying, it's not that I DON'T want to live here, it's just the I DO want to live in NZ.

Debby ... I know just how you feel. Because of delayed completions and Mark's work rotation we're going to be moving out of this house about 6 weeks before we leave for NZ. It's a horrible feeling really, I love my house. It's nothing flash but it's where my boys have grown up and we've done alot of work to it to make it 'ours'. I will be sorry to walk out of the front door for the last time.

But ... at the end of the day, it's just bricks and mortar, and we'll make our next house just as much of a home as this one.

Why are we doing this? Reality check? Because we have the opportunity to do so. We want to do it. It's about time we had another adventure (they've been abit thin on the ground since the kids came along) .... and basically because we can. How many people would like to be in our situation eh? (And I don't say that with any arrogance - just the knowledge that there's alot of people out there who are wishing they could do it too).

You'll be right girlie, what you are feeling is just natural. I always reckon that if you didn't have a few negative thoughts you'd be going into the whole thing with the wrong attitude. It's all a matter of balance - think good, think bad and then you'll land somewhere in the middle and be happy.

See you soon.

Diny

[ellen]

Thanks for sharing this. It helps to see some of the ups and downs that others go through.

Gil (my husband) leaves in a week and a half. My oldest (21) who, at this time is planning to finish university here in the States, is quite off balance at the idea of this separation. My 14 year old is busy trying to ignore it. The earliest they will see their dad will be around Christmas holidays and this from a very close family. So I too ask questions of myself about what are we doing?

Yet there are so many signs that this is what we should be doing (yes, adventures have been "thin on the ground" since we had children - and we want to teach our children the adventures, not just the securities). The emotional landscape just seems a bit trembly these days....

Ellen

[Danpoll]

Ive got 5 days to go, and as I clear out each cupboard slowly but surely even I am starting to get butterflys. Its becoming more real and the enormity of what I am doing is slowly starting to dawn on me. Amazing thing to say considering that the whole process has taken 11 months. it becomes normal, i will be moving to nz in xx and you just get on with it then when the days get less and less then you start to think. Only this last few days am i waking up at 1am and wide awake by 5.30. So the anxiety builds, but not once have I said are we doing the right thing, The way I see it is that you have one 70 year lease of your body if you look after it it will last longer therefore with such a relitevly short period on this planet then it is essential to maximise your time here. Its my job to ensure that I can bring up my child in the safest cleanest as possible environment, to give him the best oppurtunities possible to make his childhood better than mine, I cant do that here, but I believe that I can do a better job of it somewhere else, and that somewhere is NZ.

Dont worry abut the jitters there all part of the package that makes immigration so fun :mrgreen:

right back to my cupboards

Dan

[jan]

LIFE IS NOT A DRESS REHEARSAL

[Diny]

My oldest (21) who, at this time is planning to finish university here in the States, is quite off balance at the idea of this separation. My 14 year old is busy trying to ignore it.

Ellen, we're a family that's use to being apart for long periods of time. Hubby works for an oil company and basically goes anywhere in the world where there's oil. At the moment he's in Egypt working month on month off. The boys and I hate him being away but it's suprising how soon - after we've waved him off - things fall back into an easy routine. In these days of webcams, instant messaging, e-mail and cheap phone calls the time apart isn't so bad.

It's a case of just having to get on with it, that may sound abit harsh but I don't mean it to. It's just that life is so much easier and happier if you adopt a 'get on with it' attitude. Saying that however, we never stop missing Mark, the boys count the days until he returns and when we're all together again life just seems briliiant.

You'll be ok, it's only natural to have worries and doubts - and dealing with them without your partner just makes things seem a little more bleak eh?

Please feel free to PM me at any time if you need a chat.

All the best. Diny

[KD17]

That's what's unique about this forum, you know that whatever you are going through, someone has gone through (or is going through) the same.

We're on the other side of the "adventure" scale, it's never stopped and I'm just ready for it to settle down. Packing up this morning came the immortal words "next time it will be to go to NZ" :P

Diny I loved your words and basically because we can.
how true :smile :smile

Keith is very laid back about the whole thing, and found my sadness yesterday a little strange.

It is very exciting to be doing what we're doing and I think we are all; each an every one of us on the forum; very courageous and making the most of our opportunities.

See you soon girls !

and [/i]thank you

:cheers

Debby

[jess]

This thread is just what I needed to read today. We're leaving for Wellington on a scouting trip on Tuesday, and out of the blue I'm suddenly terrified this afternoon.

I grew up in my house. It was my great uncle's, built for him in 1932, then my grandparents' home, then my parents', and now it's my husband's and mine. The house is filled with furniture and things that were my parents' and remind me of them. Sometimes that's a great comfort, and sometimes it makes me sad. To top it off -- my parents ashes were buried in the back garden per their wishes years ago.

The thing is, we are only 35, and except for a few years as a child I have never lived anywhere but this city that I don't particularly like. Also, my husband and I aren't having children, and there's literally no one in our small extended family who wants to live in this house. I know it will be sold out of the family eventually, but it's hard, even if it is just slate and boards.

Well, I guess that's it, that's why I'm freaking out on the eve of our trip. Every time a step makes it feel more possible to move to New Zealand, I get very excited but also a bit worked up. Both at once. Then things settle down again. I guess I just need to weather the occasional emotional upheaval. It's nice to look at this thread and see that this sudden sense of "Good grief am I really doing this?!" hits everyone sometimes.

I can't wait to see what we think of Wellington on the ground. I know a scouting trip won't tell you everything, but it'll be great to get a feel for the place.

Thanks,
Jessica

[wilson182]

I certainly dont want to put such a positive posting onto a major downer, but I just wanted to add that you have to be prepared to (possibly) still experience these feeling when you are here too. There is a huge settling in period, and this will be different for everyone. It takes a while to build a new life, and the pull from your comfort zone of family and friends can be very strong.

As I say, I dont like posting negative comments, but like the good boy scouts and girl guides we are: Be Prepared. :nice1

[Moorf]

So true Wilson - last night I spent an hour on webcam with my little neices and jeeeez I came away feeling really quite down despite knowing they will be here for a month in December.

I've never lived close to my family as we moved all over, but I did underestimate the "distance" factor. Be prepared, as Wilson said, for the feelings you have now will still affect you for a while when you are here. Although instead of "what on earth are we doing?" it will be "what on earth have we done?"

Strangely, the feelings came on AFTER we had bought the house (nearly 8 months after we arrived here) - I know a couple of other ex-pats who were also fine until they bought their first Kiwi house and then homesickness crept up on them. Perhaps there is more of a finality to it when you put down your roots??

We too aren't having kids and I do think this makes the move easier for us in that we don't experience the feelings that some do about moving children away from grandparents etc. Try and focus on the positive elements but always recognise there will be some negatives that you will have to overcome and as Wilson said "be prepared"... Oh, and pack some jumpers !!!

[Moorf]

But ... at the end of the day, it's just bricks and mortar, and we'll make our next house just as much of a home as this one.

It took me ages to get over having sold our house, and it's only recently that I've managed to get into my head what Diny quoted above. I'd sit and look at pics of our place (I've even done a search online to see what the new owners are doing to it as we knew they were going to do up the barn in the grounds :? ) - I even dreamt of perhaps going back one day to find it was up for sale and we could buy it back!

It took the purchase of a house here in NZ to settle my thoughts. Perhaps it's the nesting instinct, I dunno, but I just didn't feel "right" until we had a house here would could make our own. Renting was pretty miserable really despite us having a reasonable place.

To apply Diny's quote to our present home "it's just weatherboard and pink batts" :nice1 but, finally, it's HOME :P