[leosus]

This is so strange to hear that the majority of people here express the Kiwi attitude that women's opinions are not as valid as men's are a reality, has got me thinking. I can remember reading in 2 different places (and if I find them I will repost) that the Kiwi men can easily be percived as wimps.

The few men I met while I was there certainly were not like that AT ALL, if anything it was more to what I had read about prior, they were "nice guys". I can remember reading that Kiwi women were known for publicly humiliating and sometimes degrading thier men. Am I the only one to have picked this up? Does anyone have examples of these attitudes?

And what the hell is an OH? I see that term everywhere and I have no idea what it means.

[gil]

Hi Leosus,
Will be as interested as you to hear the responses to this. OH is Other Half, your partner/spouse.
Gil

[kiwidebs]

Well, as a token Kiwi woman on here I'll give my viewpoint - but it will obviously be biased :laugh . I'm not known for being 'backwards at coming forwards'. I never felt growing up that my opinion was worth less than any man's opinion. In fact, historically, NZ was the first country in the world to give women the vote and to this day we have more women in parliament than England (I think it was something like 28% women MP's in NZ and 18% in England - but this data is a couple of years old). Surely that says something for women being able to speak out for themselves? As for publicly denigrating their men - hmm, think I've seen more of this on Lewisham High Street than anywhere else in the world!

On the other hand, I can't think of that many wimpy Kiwi blokes - well no worse than anywhere else I've lived. I think there's all sorts in NZ, but there is in the UK too. Plenty of henpecked men the world over (as it should be :laugh )!

I too will watch this thread with interest. Maybe things have changed in the 9 years I've been away.

(Isn't it said that NZ is the country where men are men and the sheep are scared?).

Debs

[gil]

I've heard that that's Wales.....




from LOADS of English people!:laugh :laugh

[Diny]

Another potential hot potato .....

Can't say that I've come across too many hen pecked hubbies here in NZ. Like Debs says - men here are exactly the same as men from elsewhere.

I have to say though - I have come across the occasional male chauvanist twot who thinks that a mere woman shouldn't even posess an opinion - let alone dare to voice it. If anybody cares to argue this point with me then bring it on ..... the first thing I'll do is introduce you to my father in law.

Thankfully men who share his opinions are few and far between.

Diny

[Bubbles]

If anybody cares to argue this point with me then bring it on ..... the first thing I'll do is introduce you to my father in law.

Thankfully men who share his opinions are few and far between.


I wouldn't dare Diny. I know my place :laugh :laugh ;)

[Diny]

Good boy !!!!! he he he

Diny

[Carol]

Diny - I too I know one of those.....but he is in England!


There IS a "typical kiwi bloke" stereotype.......rugger - tinnies - "she'll be right" attitude.

[Timbo]

:p You wimp John. :exit

[Bubbles]

:laugh Thanks for the support Timbo. :laugh

I'll go and sit back in the corner now. :roll

[willsken]

I have to say that I went out shopping today in Cardiff to buy a sofa. The sales man started off by calling me lovey, then proceeded to call me dear and when we talked finances even though it was me doing all the talking (as I sort out this aspect of our lives......again as it should be!!! :laugh :laugh :laugh) he wouldn't look at me, only at OH. Oh, only until OH pointed out to him he was looking at the wrong person!!

You get patronizing chauvinists all over the world, I laugh it off as I know I'm far more intelligent, witty, worldly, and successful than they will ever be......or if I'm in a bad mood poke em in the eye!!!!! :D

[Soon2baKiwi]

The estate agent we bought our house through in Ireland didn't want to deal with me AT ALL even though I was sorting everything out. He kept phoning my husband even though he would tell him to talk to me. Got my revenge though - used a different estate agent to sell it LOL

My SIL's hubby is a bit of a strange one - he talks to me like he talks to Mike 'cos he's an accountant and I know a bit about accounting and tbh, he sometimes treats me as if I know MORE than I actually do, so that's cool. But, on the other hand, he talks about women as if they were meat on a slab. He thinks nothing about putting on a programme with half naked women and commenting on them in great detail in front of my MIL. I wouldn't use the spa when we were at their house 'cos I didn't want to walk around in front of him without being fully dressed. Now, does this make him a chauvinist or just a perv? :-)

[jo b]

That makes him defiantely a PERV.

Jo

I was editing this to respell definately but I don;t know whether defiantely might be apt. :laugh

[Miffy]

Men are more blokey over here. The metrosexual is not very common although there might be more up in Auckland, but down here, southern man is alive and well.

When we were buying our car, the sales bloke actuallly asked who was the car for, as although we were interested in a hilux he didn't want to assume.

[Carl and Liz]

New Zealand is run by women - the Prime Minister, Governor General and the Chief Justice of their brand new Supreme Court are all women (there's a fourth top constitutional officer who is also a woman but I can't think of who it is).

I've read a few articles that in New Zealand's cities (like cities everywhere it seems) there are a lot more single women then there are men. The single men are either out in the country or have left the country. One article suggested that the men were running away because they were tired of being dominated by women.

In the Nukiwi relocation report I read a few years ago, if I recall correctly, there was a comment in there about how women tend to run things down there and can run their men down in public. On the other hand, in my experience, kiwis like to joke around a lot and everyone runs each other down so maybe it's not just a male female thing.

I've also heard that New Zealand is a particularly good place for over-40 women because there is a willingness to accept, and value, women who have done different things with their lives rather than follow a straight career or motherhood path.

[leosus]

Ditto to Carl and Liz's last post. And that's another thing, I don't hear the Nukiwi report mentioned at all on this forum, and I quite enjoy getting those newsletters each month, not to mention thier report is most helpful.

I just keep going back to the thought of if a woman is the top elected official how chauvanistic (overall) could it really be? When I went to open my business here in the US I cannot tell you how many "sweeties", and "honeys" I got from all sorts of men, professional and blue collar alike. I would say the US is a LONG way off of electing a female pres. or even a vp., I could be wrong but if dubya got in this time indicators would say this country is a LONG way off from a female leader.

I dont imagine there are a lot of "metrosexual" men in NZ, even thinking that makes me chuckle- particuarlly in the South Island. What I do know is there are a lot of homosexuals, and I understand Auckland at least is somewhat of a magnet for them. Too bad I do a lot of male eyebrow waxing!!

Anyone hear stats on domestic abuse comparisons between NZ/ USA/ UK? I hear that NZ has a higher domestic abuse rate, but is that REALLY higher than anywhere else? I have read about abuse rising due to losses by the All Blacks, well it is definately the same thing here with football.

[Soon2baKiwi]

I've also heard that New Zealand is a particularly good place for over-40 women because there is a willingness to accept, and value, women who have done different things with their lives rather than follow a straight career or motherhood path.

I think this is true. Experience counts for a lot here - I'm in the process of looking for another job because I always wanted to get into legal (I'm a PA) but could never get the money that I was already on but now it looks like I can here. I've already got a couple of interviews lined up with law firms and they're really open about hiring someone with no specific legal experience because I have (so many :-( ) years experience otherwise.

btw, how do I get the smilies now?

[Singel]

Hello Soon2baKiwi

This is how you could find your similies............

Step 1. Click the "User CP" located on your top left corner.
Step 2. On your left, there is a list of "Control Panel", click the "Edit Options"
Step 3. On your right, scroll down all the the way to the bottom, you will see the "Miscellaneous Options". Go to the "Message Editor Interface" and select "Standard Editor - Extra formating controls". Then save changes.

All your similies :yes :p :) will show up when you start posting.

:cheers

[Soon2baKiwi]

Thanks Singel :nice1 :clap

[dave k]

I think, as the other "perceptions" thread has shown, that it can often depend on where in NZ you are.
There's a growing divide between town & country I feel ( shown rather dramatically in the recent election results) and my experience of NZ life in liberal Wellington city would differ greatly from someone in the boonies.
But that's pretty much what you'd expect from anywhere in the UK, US etc. too I suspect.
NZ women are pretty tough cookies in any case, and can easily hold their own with the blokes.

[lisa]

Hi

just thought I would put my experiences fwd!! personally I found both the landlord of our old rental and the estate agent both a bit off with me and only really interested in talking to Andy, these are the only two experiences so far so watch this space !!!

Lisa

[Pakeha Boy]

That word on the 1st page: metrosexual man?
I don't know about anyone else, I have never heard it before?
I imagine theres loads of peeps out there that want to know but wouldn't ask so, can anyone define it for this el thicko kiwi boy?
Is it a good thing, or a bad thing you think?

[gil]

"Metrosexual" as exemplified by iconic footballer David Beckham: a modern, city-dwelling man who is so confident of his sexuality that he will wear sarongs, make-up and his wife's knickers. Probably not all at once, though I could be wrong.....

Gil
PS Apart from Beckham, other examples do not spring readily to mind

[Carl and Liz]

PB

It's a straight man whose not afraid to indulge his feminine side for example, having his hair styled, having manicures/pedicures/facials or other forms of spa-type pampering. He also can be fairly style conscious with his clothes, etc. Maybe he'll even have plastic surgery. We have a ton of them in Los Angeles (big surprise). I'm not particularly fond of the trend as I do not like a man who is more well groomed, smells better or is in any way prettier than I am (fortunately, with my husbadn I don't have to worry about that)! ;)

Regards,
Liz

P.S I loved your comment about the whinging pommie. . . on the other thread - that cracked me up!

[Bubbles]

"Metrosexual" as exemplified by iconic footballer David Beckham: a modern, city-dwelling man who is so confident of his sexuality that he will wear sarongs, make-up and his wife's knickers.

I personally wouldn't call that being sexually confident, that sounds like cross dressing to me. No offence intended to any cross dressers out there being unintentionally compared to old "Golden balls" himself, you've gotto be so careful what you say these days :roll . Hey ho, it's a free world.

[T-R3xx]

Concur, Bubbles. But, I didn't know Beckham wore his wife's nickers...

A story - My wife's old boss (female) came home early one night and found her husband wearing her nickers (yes, apparently they fit.) She divorced him.

[Timbo]

Can someone please tell me, is there such a thing as a female version of metrosexual man? If so, please define. :confused:

[gil]

Isn't that a standard woman? Are you thinking more of ladettes?
Gil

[Diny]

Metrosexual? Sounds like another PC word for a limp wrist to me!!

Give me a real man - preferably one who sweats for a living.

Metrosexual - whatever next ..... jeeze.

Diny

[baboonworld]

I think a lot of women today (not just Kiwis) are metrosexual - i would class that a a "gal with balls"! (metaphorically speaking of course not in the Footballers Wives/Nadia BB way).

I think men turn out a chauvanists when their mothers dont teach them how to iron. Or when they finally realise that women are right - but cant admit it so run them down or ignore their point of view.

How many of you would consider yourselves (if a woman) or your wife/partner (if u are a bloke) to be the person that runs your house?? Women have been in charge of the household for years - with the man contributing financially.

What I hate is trademen who think that you wont understand what they are talking about and so want to speak to your husband (fortunately for me i have worked in construction for 17 yrs and know a thing or two!)

[StevieD]

Metrosexual = nancy boy!

[Bubbles]

I think men turn out a chauvanists when their mothers dont teach them how to iron.

:laugh :laugh :laugh

Where did you pluck that one from. :confused: Please explain.

TIA

[Carl and Liz]

Let's face it - there are stupid people everywhere and there is no reason to believe that New Zealand is any different. If someone is patronizing to you, for whatever reason, take your business elsewhere or find a way around the situation. Life is too short to waste time with these sorts.

On a more positive note, I read a good book called "Woman 2 Woman" by Amanda Ellis and June McCabe. It's about NZ women sharing their experiences in their careers and in having their own business. Lots of good information and insights.

Liz

[Miffy]

That word on the 1st page: metrosexual man?
I don't know about anyone else, I have never heard it before?
I imagine theres loads of peeps out there that want to know but wouldn't ask so, can anyone define it for this el thicko kiwi boy?
Is it a good thing, or a bad thing you think?

Metrosexuals are straight men who do some of the following:

Instead of going to the barbers, would go to the hairdressor for a wash cut and blow dry.
Have regular manicures & pedicures.
Do not just shave & brush teeth in the morning but have a regime and have various day and night skin products.
They are usually on a diet (atkins or GI) or at least will eat heathly
They are always well groomed and have a massive warbdrobe. Shopping for colthes is a joy not a chore. Always know what is the latest fashion. Length of trouser or cut / latest style of trainers, etc.
They might not play team sports but will have a gym membership and go regularaly.
Always have a tidy house (prolly have a cleaner in once a week), no dirty laundry lieing around (would all be sent out to be laundered by someone else)
Enjoys cooking. Not just heating up some sauce and stir frying some meat, but cooking from scratch total meals just for him, if friends are coming round will happily create something special in the kitchen and be in there all afternoon.

They are just as blokey as the next man, they are not 'limp wristed' or efeminate (sp?) just a bit more polished!

Whether thats a good or bad thing its up to personal taste!

[veronica]

I've met no differences in either NZ or the UK in attitudes to women. It's types of people in this instance, not a UK NZ sort of thing, and its not always an age thing either. lot depends on upbringing again, the old parenting chestnut, so we won't go there.

[leosus]

I always understood Metrosexual to be derived from "metropolitan sexuality". It would be hard to say what they do and what they don't do, and there are certainly varying degrees. I own a salon and have SEVERAL male clients. I would definately not lump them all into the same category, and most certainly not the category of metrosexual.

Very few of my personal male clients, and the salon's male clients in general I would describe as effeminate, let alone metrosexual. These men are just tired of getting butchered at the cheap shops, or barbers, and need to look decent for thier competitive job market.

I am getting the impression that Kiwi men dont share the same attitude on this...

[Pakeha Boy]

Wowww....thanks for the elucidation guys.

Boy, I mean heck, after reading your replies I'm really so jolly well grateful that the good Lord has blessed me with enough sexual confidence to negate the need to start rummaging through my good wifes' drawers in search of nail polish, gel and underwear!

phew!

[leosus]

Wowww....thanks for the elucidation guys.

Boy, I mean heck, after reading your replies I'm really so jolly well grateful that the good Lord has blessed me with enough sexual confidence to negate the need to start rummaging through my good wifes' drawers in search of nail polish, gel and underwear!

phew!

Oh come on Pakeha Boy! You know you want to have your eyebrows worked on! No man looks good in a unibrow...
____
* J *
____

Before



_ _
*J*
\_/

After


He He He...

[dave k]

Give me a real man - preferably one who sweats for a living.

You mean a professional Sauna taker?

:D

[Diny]

Good one !!!