logo

  New Zealand Immigration Guide









gil
8th October 2005, 06:22 PM
Hi everyone,

I have been reading the forum with interest recently (not posting so much as work has been consuming most of my energy, followed closely by the family). It seems to me that there have been some widely differing perspectives offered in a wide range of tones and styles, which reflects life and society pretty much as I have experienced them (rich tapestry etc).



I am struck by a couple of "inconsistencies" that, in my opinion, these threads have highlighted. I would stress that this is more of an overview gleaned from different ENZ forums and I understand that they were not necessarily intended to be deliberately contradictory.

.

Firstly, there is a hankering for better times as in "The UK is not the place of our childhood" alongside "It's just the lack of choice that you have to get used to". The days of more simple living were just that: simpler times meant simpler pleasures and simpler choices, far less consumer choice than we have today. They seem to me to go hand in hand, so if you are willing to move to a “simpler” life, you need to recognise that simplicity may well attach to all aspects of life.



Secondly, there is something deep at the heart of today's UK that says choice is automatically good and a right. In my view, the overwhelming choices we have in most spheres of life have affected us to the point where we no longer recognise the balance between privilege and responsibility. Many people seem to think they have the right to choose everything in life (quite a privilege!) but do not feel they need to exercise responsibility for those choices, so when something doesn't work, the response is not always "I made this choice and I will deal with the consequences", but " This didn't work because....... * "

* insert any external culprit you like



Thirdly, I get the sense that some of us feel it is perfectly acceptable for a British person to hold and express views about other nationalities but that it is not acceptable for other nationalities to hold and express views about the British. Well, you can’t have your cake and eat it. Cause and effect and all that: if you dish it out, you’ve got to be prepared to take it as well.



Finally, reading through the threads “Perception to Reality” and “Forum Food for Thought” brought to mind an old, apocryphal story I once heard:

A young man is traveling from his home town to a new town where he is looking to make a fresh, new start. He sees the town he is heading for in the distance, and starts to wonder what it will be like. On the very edge of the town, he spies an elderly man seated under a tree. Stopping by the old man, the young man asks him “What are the people like in this town?” The old man responds with the question “Tell me, what were folk like where you have come from?” “Oh,” says the young man, “they were a miserable lot, not very nice at all.” “Then turn back,” replies the old man “for you will find them much the same here.”

A day later, another young man sets off on the same path. He arrives at the tree where the old man is seated, and asks the same question as the first young man, “What are the people like in this town?” The old man responds with the same question as before “Tell me, what were folk like where you have come from?” “Oh,” says the young man, “they were lovely, kind, friendly and helpful.” “Then go on,” replies the old man “for you will find them much the same here.”



I hope we all carry on sharing our diverse views and experiences together on this forum, it’s so useful and helpful. If I could just paraphrase a title of a book I have on different personality types though: There’s nothing wrong with me, I’m just not you!



Gil

kiwidebs
8th October 2005, 07:33 PM
Thank you Gil for the voice of reason. That is a lovely post and sums it all up nicely.

Debs

Avalon
8th October 2005, 08:44 PM
Gil,

Thats a really good post.

Simplicity: Couldnt aggree more. I never really bought into the "rat race" so many things that are different here dont bother me. Too much choice does my head in becasue I spend so long trying to work out the BEST option. I read an article a few years ago saying that in some people depression was being caused because thye had too many choices. In fact one of the things that may have made my transistion harder is that I CAN still get stuff I want from the UK. I honestly dont know if not having that option would have made the last 9 months easier.

Responsibilty, choices and the consequencies of those choices. Have you been watching Babylon 5 lately?????

Moorf
8th October 2005, 09:02 PM
Gil,

As usual, an excellent and thought provoking post :nice1

Earlier I was watching an excellent documentary currently showing in NZ called Frontier of Dreams, and they described how the propoganda used to entice people to emigrate to NZ was centred around describing how similar it was to the UK.

Perhaps we've never quite thrown off this perception as a nation?

And settle they did, being without the luxury of choice to return.

Moorf

Carol
8th October 2005, 09:14 PM
It took me a long long time to get used to the simplicity of life here.
I knew in my heart that it was THAT I was after - but I had become so materialistic it was hard to put into practice.
It still is sometimes.....

When my friends have been out on holiday here - they never buy much to take back.
Mainly because there isn't anything here that they can't get bigger or "better" in the UK.
Not a single one of them have said they would like to move here...........which proves one thing to me - either you love NZ and the simple way of life - or you dont.

This is the dilemma faced by immigrants every single day.

I have given it 9 years ...........the only thing I truly miss - to the bottom of my heart - is my family.

If nothing else - emigrating is the best process I have ever been through to assess your priorities in life.

My priorities lie with my children.
I am here for them and them only.

Because i know in my heart - this is the best place for THEM.
(Not me though - I'm still a materialistic bitch at heart!! ;) :laugh )
C

Carol
8th October 2005, 09:16 PM
Earlier I was watching an excellent documentary currently showing in NZ called Frontier of Dreams, and they described how the propoganda used to entice people to emigrate to NZ was centred around describing how similar it was to the UK.

Perhaps we've never quite thrown off this perception as a nation?

And settle they did, being without the luxury of choice to return.

Moorf

Me too Helen........it promises to be an exceptional series......

I sometimes think those settlers - with no choice of return - were luckier than I - who am constantly tempted to go....
C

jo b
8th October 2005, 09:34 PM
Gil

what a brilliant post.

That story was the one I was thinking of in the 'perseption to reality post'
My response to Jim was you will find you attact the wrong sort wherever you go. That was my meaning.

As for choices I wholeheartedly agree. I feel that now in Britain people have so much missing in their lives that they fill it with non-sensical electrical gadgets that they don't need. And if that gadget doesn't fill the gap they go out and get another. I know I have fell for the trap why....because I can. I recognise my downfalls and that's why I seek a 'simpler' life. One where I can focus on bringing up my children as thoughtful respectful kid, rather than screaming for the latest must have.

Ians Aunty has lived in South Africa and Scotland, and has moved around the Uk an awful lot with her husbands job.
The advice she gave me on NZ was...

"Don't become a whenwe, you will bore poeple"

I said what do you mean. She said if you find yourself keep saying when we lived in.... and when we lived in... people will swtich off, they are not interested in your old town, city or country, they are interested in their own because thats were they live.

Wise words I think.

Jo

Diny
8th October 2005, 10:20 PM
Another very good post with some very good comments. I have to admit that since moving here we have simplified our lives right back to the knuckle (compared to how we lived in the UK).

My cupboards are no longer full of every kind of delacacy (sp) you could poke a stick at, I buy far more fresh fruit & veg. The few luxury gadgets we bought with us from the UK are still packed and stored in the garage - proof that we're coping without them very well. Even the DVD and the video player remain un-connected. We have worked our budget out and we stick to it, by the end of the month we're surviving on fruits of the fridge and beans on toast - so what? I LOVE beans on toast !!!! Apart from our mortgage we don't owe a living soul a single brass razoo - what a fantastic feeling. We have made a concerted effort to save up for any extras we may want instead of just getting them. Gone are the days of simply walking into a shop, taking required item from the shelf and handing over any one of several 'flexible friends'.

I may be going off on abit of a tangent here but what I'm trying to say is that this move for us has had alot to do with breaking old habits. We were so use to just buying. Meals out were something we did 'cos neither of us could be bothered to cook. Over here they are a treat and we enjoy them so much more (apart from that shocking place we went to in Taupo).

At home we would probably spend our weekends shopping or going to the cinema or doing some other activity that required us to have our hands constantly in our pockets. The weekends here will find us on our favourite beach or out and about rubber necking. Our favourite cafe by the beach does a really good lunch of mini fish and chips for $4 a head, we would have shied away from such cheap food back at home.

We didn't know how well this arrangement would work. It's all very well living to a budget knowing that if you have a sticky month you can simply dip into the savings - but what's the point?

I don't know about anybody else but we find ourselves full of contradictions. We like the simpler way of life but get irritated by it at times. We like the cheaper housing (compared to where we came from in the UK) but hate the inadiquate shoddiness of the homes. We like the casual approach of Kiwis but detest the public use of foul language. The (occasional) Kiwi tendancy to think they are the best at just about anything does irritate the heck out of me - until I think back to that very same attitude being prevalent at home too. The story of the 2 young men travelling towards the village is so apt !!!

Moving here has been one hell of an adventure. I now love it here but I know I would still love to be back home. I have a foot in both camps and find myself defending/slagging off both. Very confusing !!!!

I still reckon that there's nothing like finding out for yourself. This forum is just fantastic - so much info, so many points of view, so much support, but until we arrive in the country and experience living here (compared to a glossy magazine holiday) for ourselves there's just no way of telling what our reactions/opinions will be. We will all weather the storm in different ways. We will all think we are right because that's human nature.

My advice - take all the info you gather on board and use it as a 'rough guide'. My kids will often turn their nose up at a completely new dish at meal times saying they don't like it. I tell them there's no way they know whether they do or not until they try it. The same applies to living in NZ.

Sorry about the dis-jointed post - blame the Villa Maria Gewurztraminer.

Diny

pleccy2000
9th October 2005, 01:50 AM
gil, that is the best post i have ever read on this forum. there's nothing i feel i can add to it.

Carol
9th October 2005, 05:42 AM
I think this is also another reason why some people go back.....back to familiarity and security (and of course loved ones...)

But also why - they realise when the get there that life is about so much more...................and often they return...

neilw71
9th October 2005, 05:57 AM
One thing I would like to comment on is the specific use of "British" in:

Thirdly, I get the sense that some of us feel it is perfectly acceptable for a British person to hold and express views about other nationalities but that it is not acceptable for other nationalities to hold and express views about the British. Well, you can’t have your cake and eat it. Cause and effect and all that: if you dish it out, you’ve got to be prepared to take it as well.

The sentiment of what you say is spot on - but to emphasise British is wrong IMHO. I think that can be applied to many many nationalities these days and is more about the way humans are heading, rather than it being a specific trait of us Brits.

Just a thought !

Neil

pleccy2000
9th October 2005, 06:41 AM
I think this is also another reason why some people go back.....back to familiarity and security (and of course loved ones...)

But also why - they realise when the get there that life is about so much more...................and often they return...

who on earth would do such a thing carol?

Carol
9th October 2005, 07:36 AM
:D ;)


maybe we'll cya next time your down this way Adam... :cheers

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15