[Jaideco]

I am struggling at the moment to make up my mind over my current situation and whether or not to make the leap. I am in a position that I consider myself very, *VERY* lucky to be in, I have almost by accident ended up with a job offer, visa sponsorship and potentially a very decent salary in NZ terms. Unfortunately I am one of those folks who does like security and the offer doesn't translate to any more than I am on in the UK now, if this vacancy were in England, I probably wouldn't consider changing jobs for it.

The main question in my mind is the value of the New Zealand "X" factor, what else there is to offer from living there for a while that you couldn't get from an extended holiday for instance. I notice that most of you who are particularly keen to make the move seem to be doing so for long term motives such as providing a better future for your children or because you have a special appreciation of the countryside/clean air feel that the country has. These don't really apply to me because I don't have kids, have never minded town life and wasn't planning on staying in NZ permanently.

Has anyone gone out there with the intention of just spending six months to two years living and working there for the experience and then come back? What happened? Did you fall in love with the place and decide you wanted to stay? Did you return and find it a worthwhile experience? At the moment NZ feels a bit like a big unknown to me and although I feel really excited about the prospect of going, but I cannot really work out whether it is just because it is so in demand with other people (and I am going with the crowd) or if there are reasons that are specific to me. Whether there are tangible reasons why I would be happier or more fulfilled for the experience.

Can anyone advise a poor lost soul?

[sizzlingbadger]

I notice you're from Basingstoke, I used to live there up until 5 years ago when I moved up north.

We took a trip back to Basingstoke in January of this year before we set off on our big trip to NZ. I have to say it's changed so much and in ours not really for the better. We were really surprised by the amount of houses now gone up, especially Beggarwood/Hatch Warren which used to be green fields.

I'd say if you've managed to land yourself a job offer and you're considering the move then do it. You can always come back at the end of the day if you don't like NZ. One possibility is to come out on holiday check out NZ see if you like it or jump in with both feet and do it :D

We've been here since April this year and haven't regretted a minute of it. Yes we have three kids but we didn't do it just for them although they were the ones that spurned us on. We're more country people than town people but we both love Wellington and could quite happily live in the centre. It's a very friendly place and you've got everything in a short walking distance that you could need.

Like a lot of people on here and other places have said 'Life isn't a rehearsal it's the real thing' .

Good Luck :nice1

[ruthyroo]

TBH my gut instinct is to say stick with your UK job / life and save up for an extended holiday in NZ - but then I liked my life in the UK and I don't have kids. We've been here 18 months now and in all honesty we could have done a lot of the things we have really enjoyed in NZ on holiday, without the stress of actually starting over and all the financial / job / housing stresses.

The X factor is here for a lot of people - like you I perceive many of them to be a) families with young kids looking to the long term, b) people who are better able to cope with financial insecurity and uncertainty than me and / or c) people who are really convinced that life in NZ has to be better than the UK (despite any suggestion / evidence to the contrary - hence all the punch ups on this forum!!) because life in the UK is so dire...

Oh but I forgot d) people that wanted an adventure and figured they had nothing to lose by having a go. That's where we are. You might fall in there also, but it's up to you. Good luck whatever!

[Diny]

I have to agree with Ruth (again - sorry - not meaning to be a creep). I think that if you're happy with living in the UK then (talking from experience) NZ isn't really going to offer you that much more.

I love the UK and the life we had there. I guess it's because of this I don't consider NZ to be the great 'Valhalla' that some people do. I don't mean that in a sarcastic manner, I just mean that 'tit for tat' I think my UK and NZ lifestyles don't vary that much. I love NZ and am happy to be here, but going to your original question, I think I'd be alot happier here if I knew that it was just a temporary visit of a couple of years or so. Personally I don't see myself making old bones here.

You could come out on a temp basis and take it from there. If you only have a couple of years under your belt then there's always that 'light at the end of the tunnel' (for the want of a better phrase). You never know - during that temp period you may decide that you want to stay here forever - or you may realise that the UK is the place to be. An extended visit could be what you need to cure the wanderlust.

One thing I have to say though, if you don't come over (for however long) - you'll more than likely live to regret it. I just reckon that it may not be a good idea to burn all your bridges.

Good luck in whatever you decide.

Diny

[Carol]

Everyone is different.
I often read things on here and thing "yeah right WHATEVER!"

New Zealand is NOT the Land of Milk and Honey.
It is NOT Eutopia.
I am constantly aware that I am "foreign" (And I've been here for nearly 10 years!!!)
The weather is ........um......variable.
The salaries are dire.
The housing is little more than a garden shed.......yes even the posh looking stuff!


BUT


There IS an X factor.
And if you have even an ounce of adventure in your spirit you will want to know what it is like.
If I was you - I would come for a year. Work.......enjoy.....go back.

I can't go back. I have come here for a specific reason and I am living it. My kids. They are now kiwis and there is no way on earth I could make them change back. Or would ever want to.
I am paying the price for that - but trying my damndest to get over to see my mum and dad every other year.

Without them in the equation I wouldnt be here. Absolutely no doubt.
But....I'm glad I came - for the experience.

Life's too short to be sat there thinking "what if"


Diny is right. (Again!!!! :p )

Carol

[Smiler]

I'll be a bigger creep and agree with everything said already but especially Carol's 'What if'

When we let the cat out of the bag on moving here the number of people that said, 'we have thought of doing that, lucky you, I wish I had the courage' OR ' we were going to NZ when we were younger but didn't'. I thought how sad that was and how fortunate I am to be able to have the opportunity to do this. I miss my family so much it hurts, but I'm finding ways to cope.

It isn't all scenery, milk, honey and sheep, but however long we stay, I won't be sitting in my old folks home, whinging to the grandkids that 'we thought of going there once'
I WILL HAVE DONE IT.:raebanana :raebanana

Whatever you decide to do, good luck. There are some good suggestions here. What works for some, may not work for others. You may be having a wobble, which we have all had and still have.

Deborah

[zardell]

You don't say what age bracket you are in or whether or not you will be going alone or with a partner. You tended to use the singular 'I' as opposed to 'we' in your post, so for the purpose of this reply, lets assume you're single, no kids.

On that assumption, you are therefor only responsible for yourself, in other words, you dont have to consider another person(s) in any of your decisions (except of course some family members and friends you will be leaving in the uk)

So, what are you (honestly) worrying about ?? You say that the path to NZ has been made easy for you, and that you will be earning good bucks, with no visa/financial worries either then eh?

I tend to think that maybe this job offer/lifestyle change has come as an unexpected surprise and shock to you. Most people on this forum have thought long and hard before making their ultimate decision and you are not being given the opportunity to do that, although I am sure that the opposite (for some) is also true.

Sit down and be honest with yourself....what is the REAL reason/emotion that is holding you back. Being alone in a new country would petrify me. You dont have to justify yourself to anybody - its your business.....just be true to yourself. We on this forum dont want to know your business, but believe me when I say that we are all here to bounce off each other. I have made some really good friends on here with people I have never met.

I really want to finish off by saying that those big planes that take us to NZ turn round and come back - so can you !! Just make sure that you always have enough in the bank to purchase a return ticket !

Good luck and remember that whatever you decide will be right for you at the time.

Julie

x

[kiwidollie]

You talk much sense Zardell - I would go along with that post.

[Jaideco]

Hello Everyone,

Thank you for all your comments, and I welcome any more that come after.

Zardell, you are correct, I am a 29 year old singleton in Basingstoke, a University grad who never took a gap year and still feels that he might have missed out on the experience. This did come as an immense shock to me, I have applied to several jobs in England over my 5 year tenure with my current company but was always rejected flat so when an agent asked to put me forward for this job in October and a month long silence followed, I thought nothing of it.

When the offer did come it was roughly equal to what I currently earn in the UK but significantly less than I had been told the role would pay. I am not a greedy person in general and this would pay the bills but it was a bit disappointing and a little worrying that this would leave money so tight if I were to have trouble letting the house in the UK or need to leave the new job unexpectedly. My remaining motives for going are reasonably clear, having an explore, learning what it is like to live amongst a new (albeit similar) culture, having a second employer on my cv and most of all putting to rest the part of me that would always be wondering what if.

The other part of me is thinking that I should stay in the UK and stay with my job security, and hey even if I do get laid off I would now get a tidy redundancy package after 5 years. Ultimately I know that my true friends will still be there for me, my family will still be there for me, my house will still be there if I rent it out. I am not afraid of these things but in the absence of more money or better prospects, I just think I need to get my head clear of what my motivation really is. :confused:

Anyway, I am speaking to my prospective new boss later today, hopefully we can arrange something then.

[zardell]

Sit down - work out worse case scenario.

If you could/couldn't handle the worst then base your decision on that.

Just remember - nothing ever stays the same. We need change to develop.

We all make mistakes too, but if we are sensible, we learn by them.

You don't sound stupid to me!!

Good luck with your decision.

Julie

x

[tonyb]

Hi All,

A very interesting thread.

I myself hope to be living and working in NZ with my wife and kids from next July/Aug.
I agree with Julies sentiments,that you have to be true to yourself and go for what you feel is right at the time. Im 48 a qualified psychiatric nusre, only been qualified less than a year ago. Ive always wanted to try out a life in a different land ever since i was small and its only now that ive got the oppotunity. I know i could end up with egg on my face and realise it aint for me but i know deep in my heart that i aint gonna get many more chances to experience that feeling of adventure !! Its not only the adventure. Im truly interested in how mental health is approached in other countries. So, even if i do get too homesick and return at least ive gained some valuable experiences. Of course im gonna miss family and friends here. My wife and children also see it as an adventure and what better adventure for children than to meet another way of life and differebt cultures which can only make their lives richer. I, like many people doesnt want to be sitting in traffic on the M25 seven years from now ( when id be too old to go to NZ) and be thinking "if only id give it a try". As Julie said. you will make the right decision for you in the end, and no-one else can make that decision for you however much they glorify or demonise NZ or anywhere else for that matter.

Good Luck in whatever you do !!!!

Tony

[gil]

Hi Jaideco,

It looks as if you've got some real food for thought from everyone here. Just to add my two penn'orth, some questions to consider:

What if you don't go? How will you feel in three months? And six? A year? Five years?
What if you do go? How will you feel in three months? And six? A year? Five years?
What's most important to you?
What constitutes "worthwhile" for you?
What's your sense of what would make you happier or more fulfilled?
What makes you feel "a lost soul" with respect to this? Or not with respect to this?
What might you gain?
What might you lose?
Ir may also be worthwhile spending some time thinking through your short- and long-term motivations more genrally and see how NZ figures in there.

Good luck and trust your own feelings on this,
All the best,
Gil

[Smiler]

Hello Tonyb and family


Welcome to the forum :clap :clap

You sound like you have some good plans and and a keen spirit of adventure too. It is an adventure, especially for the children (and us bigger ones)

Look forward to hearing how you all progress. Keep us posted. Any questions? There is a mine of info on here, ask away.

Jaideco, let us know how you feel after you have spoken to your new boss. Good luck. :nice1


Deborah

[veronica]

Have to agree with everything that Gil has said on the 'What if' scene. but would also really like to stress the "If only" one.

BUT......would also say Pete had a really good job in the UK, profitable company, worked for them for 22 years and when he was 53 the american HO made everyone (350 people) redundant with not a thank you cos they figured the company would be more profitable to run from one of the middle european countries......There is, in the end, no such thing as job security.

We are over here now and living a very different lifestyle to our one in the UK, we have opened a backpackers and a ski shop together (that was hard having always worked separately) Our KIds! are the same age as you and we have 1 in Auckland and another and a foster daughter in the UK. so the kids thing doesnt apply to us.

Unlike some of the others earliere in the thread I would encourage you to give it a go, and perhaps if you have property in the UK then to rent it our for a year or two. It would also be worth your while, especially if you missed having a gap year to give yourself a month between jobs and come over here and do the backpacker thing and see a bit of NZ before you start, Go for it.

One of our kids friends had such plans for the different things he wanted to do in his life and he was killed at 21 in an accident. life is too short to put security first.

If you don't enjoy it here and return to the UK then you will have had a life experience outside of what you have now, all makes for a 'personal growth' thing.

[zardell]

Jaideco.

Just happened by chance to read an old post of yours and I need to ask.........do you still work for NTL ??

If the answer is yes, can I ask another question please........whats to consider ??

Book your flight...........

:D

Julie

x

[tigerlily]

Immigration is hard and expensive. I'd say wait until you really want to do it. You will need that reserve of energy to get you through the tough times. Have that extended holiday and see if that changes your mind?

[Richard_from_Long Beach]

Jaideco,

Tigerlily's right: the emigration process is not free in terms of money or time. So you'll need motivation to do it.

I went to live in Christchurch on a six-month permit last year. (Like you, I'm single and no kids.) I did fall in love with NZ and did not want to leave. Now I'm applying for permanent residency. But everyone's reasons are unique to his or her own situation--I can't say if you'll like NZ or if your life in NZ is going to be any better than in Basingstoke. From what you've told us, it sounds like you won't necessarily be any worse off. So, if you're the adventurous sort, I say do it. I place a high value on experiencing different things and places--that was my X factor. My concerns for you would be (1) what kind of financial situation you're in, because if you take the NZ job and then want to abort, can you get a job back home? and (2) leaving your friends and family--are you OK with building a new social life?

[jubjub]

Probably repeating a couple of other folks here.

The question you need to answer for yourself is "will I regret it if I dont do give it a try?"

You may well be content now, but do you see the situation still being the same in a couple of years, will you be sat in your current UK job, wishing you had come here?

Its not a stress free or financially easy process, and does take a bit of time.

If you come, leave yourself an "out" ie a fund in the UK to get back, and maybe even just rent out your house for a year? Like you said, you never had your "gap" year, so why not do it now, while you only have yourself to worry about?

[Jaideco]

Hi Guys,

Lots of good ideas and valuable insights here, I thank you all.

The first thing that I should say is that I am restless where I am in my life and do want to shake things up a bit. I don't know whether that suggests a change of country or just a change of career or perhaps just a visit to Vegas with my life savings. ;) Zardell, yep you have a point about current employer, what are your experiences with the green and purple one?

The second thing is that there are a lot of things about my life that I regret. People I didn't ask out, jobs I was too afraid to apply for, opportunities to challenge myself that I didn't take and I feel that in some ways I have suffered in terms of my confidence and my life experience. There are no things however that I can think of that make me think... "I wish I hadn't done that!" In my mind, this is a problem.

So bringing you guys up to date, I have spoken to my boss and he isn't shifting on his offer, although I do feel more assured now that it would be stable. In pound terms I would definately be worse off financially but I am sorely tempted to accept just to see what happens. Going back to what Gil said, I know what would happen if I say... 3, 5, 10 years from now I would still be stewing waiting for my life to change. If I go, I might screw up big time and end up back here without a job but I might also really like it out there, or it might be the start of a new chapter of living in any number of other countries. As far as I am concerned, I am going to place a wager on New Zealand but I am now just going to decide what my stake is.

To vacation or to live tis the question...

[foolsgold99]

Before you read this post, pleasr bear in mind that nothing of what I'm about to talk about is specfic to NZ, I'd say the same if your were thinking about moving to Albania or the Antartic.

I'd ask a question, what would (another) year in the UK give you as a person in terms of life experience that you wouldn't get from a year (or more) in NZ ??

I suspect the answer is very little, one of my great fears was stagnation (I'm 34 btw, married, had a nice life in UK, we both have degrees, decent salary, nice house etc etc). But if I'd stayed there (been here for 8 month now) would I have grown as a person ? Would I have been pushed, and challenged ?? nope I'd have just floated along, day after day. Happy enought, but my mindset would have been the same. Working with people that live like me, and think like me. It just reinforces your thinking, and makes you less open to new ideas.

I guess what i'm saying is, great challenges as a person, bring out great performance. The simple experience of packing up your life for a year or two, will be rewarding and enrich you as an individual. you will meet different people, who will have different view points on life. It will change your view of the world, and widen your horizens. That in itself is worth the hassle of the move. Remember if you really don't like it, it's only 1 day on the plane to go back to basingstoke.


I like living in NZ very much, I enjoy the climate, the people and the culture, but I think it would have been good for me pretty much wherever I'd gone. More than that, I like the fact that I'm a migrant, it's changed me, and that's good.

[Smiler]

J


This is only my personal opinion NOt a suggestion but you may as well flush the money down the toilet in Basingstoke than go to Vegas :exit

You said,
"The second thing is that there are a lot of things about my life that I regret. People I didn't ask out, jobs I was too afraid to apply for, opportunities to challenge myself that I didn't take and I feel that in some ways I have suffered in terms of my confidence and my life experience. There are no things however that I can think of that make me think... "I wish I hadn't done that!" In my mind"

I felt this way until I hit 40, lacked confidence, big fear factor, single Mum, no money. I became ill for a long time after an operation and that was really my turning point. I wondered what had really held me back and started searching for the answers. I soon gave up on that and started doing not thinking.

I'm still not the most confident in the world, find it difficult to meet new people and I worry a lot. But I push myself to the limit and to be honest starting here in NZ has made me lose some of the fear factor, that for so long held me back.

I can't tell you how to decide, nor should I. I'm just trying to show that there are boundaries that you can push hard on from within. A new country, a new job where no one knows 'you' and a little safety net in the UK...........................


I've spent hours writing this and look what foolsgold has said in that time. :o

D

[ruthyroo]

Just to confuse you, I am going to go back on what I said before and say - go for it!! You don't sound like you've had a big adventure in life yet that you will look back on when you're old and settled and say, "I gave that a go - it was terrible / brilliant / whatever - at least I tried it". At your age / stage in life you really don't have any responsibilities to anyone except yourself, so why not go for it? We are treating this like an extended working holiday - a chance to experience life on the other side of the planet. We haven't ever seen being in NZ as the be all and end all - we have rented out our flat in Edinburgh rather than selling up lock stock and barrell, and while we're not exactly racing up the corporate ladder, neither are we stagnating in our jobs here. We have applied for and been granted PR, after coming over on 3 yr WP but that was really for freedom of choice job wise rather than becuase this is a permanent move.

At the end of the day you / we can always go home if it doesn't work out. No one has forced us to be here, and if it all does get too hard, then we might well head elsewhere. But at least we have had some life changing expereinces (good and bad) en route. Nothing's permanent unless you want it to be.

[gil]

I am restless where I am in my life and do want to shake things up a bit..............................................t here are a lot of things about my life that I regret. People I didn't ask out, jobs I was too afraid to apply for, opportunities to challenge myself that I didn't take and I feel that in some ways I have suffered in terms of my confidence and my life experience. There are no things however that I can think of that make me think... "I wish I hadn't done that!" In my mind, this is a problem.

Jaideco, it sounds like you are on the cusp of something VERY exciting here (whether or not that means NZ longer-term). Please keep us posted with your thinking/decisions.

From what other people have said, a vacation can easily be followed by an aplication for residence (check out the new requirements though!), whilst going straight for the PR route is a bit costly. Having said that, we went the PR route for me, Steve and our four kids (so it was very costly!) and we have never been to NZ. It just seemed (after extremely thorough research) the right option for us. The other thing we were looking into was the Pyrenees-Atlantique area of France (Biarritz) and that was after discarding the idea of the wilds of Pembrokeshire.

I'm sure everyone wishes you every success and blessing you could possibly ask for (and more) as you embark on truly living your life.

Take care,
Gil
x

[kiwidollie]

Can I just thank everyone for posting on this thread? I sometimes find it impossible to put in to words exactly why I want to uproot myself and my family and head off into the wide blue yonder.

Between the posts here you have managed to articulate exactly the way I feel in my life now and exactly the reasons I want to change things.

I've said it before and I'll say it again this forum is excellent!!!!!!!

[K&CS]

I don't think there's too much that I can add that hasn't been already said. I would just say 'go for it' - you'll regret it if you don't. You may not settle and end up coming back, but at least you've given it a go. I get the impression that this is what you want deep down - you just need someone to give you the shove.

Good luck whatever you decide (but I think you should decide to try NZ!)

Kate x

[willsken]

Everything that can be said has been. So I echo all the others who have said...... Be brave and go for it! :nice1

[kiwidebs]

I agree with what most of the others have said - if you're young and single, go for it!! If it doesn't work out, come back. At least you won't be uprooting kids etc - if you wait ten years you may have the consideration of partner, kids etc.
You never know what life has in store for you. I came to the UK on a working holiday visa 9 years ago, met my husband and we're now planning to move back to NZ with two kids and a load of furniture etc (a bit more baggage than the backpack I bought over 9 years ago :laugh ).

Go for it :yes . Life's too short for 'what ifs'.

Debs

[veronica]

Permanent residence isn't needed for this adventure so no big expense, its easy enough to apply for a work visa with the support of the company that has been out headhunting, that won't cost much. Then further down the line if permanent residence is deemed desirable then the expense can be justified. Also at 29 it would be possible to get over here and start for a year on the Working Holiday visa if that made the work start time easier.

[jo b]

I totally agree with Julie,

she speaketh much sense,

Is there anyway you could get a 12, 18 month or 2 year sabbatical from your current employer. That way you can try NZ out but still have the security of a good job if you decide to go back.

Jo

[A & M]

Nothing much to add to all the good advice others have already given .... just to say that we have just returned to the UK from our "gap year" in NZ and it was a great experience for us. We rented our house, I took a year's sabbatical from my job and we travelled around at the beginning and end of the year. For the middle 9 months or so my husband worked and we rented a house. It's a fair bit to organise before you go, but probably simpler for just one rather than a family of 4.

Like most of the others, I'd say go for it and keep an open mind. Think of it as an adventure.

Good luck, Mandy

[adamsat]

Nothing new to add from all the other advice. I'd certainly go for it I were you. There were a number of reasons why we came here, but one of the factors influencing me was I had been with the same employer for 22 years and wanted to see if I could survive in a different environment. I could see my whole working life mapped out in front of me back in the UK - I know there is no such thing as a secure job anymore but I had the nearest thing to it - I just didn't want to get to retirement age having spent my whole life with one company.

Everyone's circumstance is different, but believe in your own abilities and give it a go.

[suzie b]

I am intersted to know how you felt about going to nz for ayear with the family.Was it easy to arrange and did your children attend school as international students?.What sort of cost is involved if you don@t mind saying.

[A & M]

Suzie,
We felt that a year in NZ with children would be a great experience for them (they are 12 and 9) and this turned out to be the case. They were able to go to the local school where we lived - we had work permits because my husband got a teaching job, so they had student visas, which entitle them to state education in NZ. So schooling for them was free, apart from uniforms etc.

As to cost - when the UK house was rented (for 7 months out of the 12 we were away) the UK costs of mortgage, insurance etc were covered, and when one of us was earning in NZ the NZ costs were covered, although we lived a pretty frugal existence. So the extra costs for the year were the air fares and all the extra travelling we did. Plus we were paying mortgage and rent for a couple of months.

We took about a year to plan the trip, sort the NZQA paperwork so Andy had all the right boxes ticked to work as a teacher, sort the house so it was in a fit state to rent out and sort the finances. It was a lot of work to arrange, but definitely worth it.

Hope this helps, Mandy

[Jaideco]

Hello Everyone,

Thank you all soooo... soooo.... much for all of your ideas and encouragement. I had no idea that this subject would be as topical as it has been. I am really very touched.

I am just facing the next hurdle at the moment, discussing it with the parents while I am up for Christmas... needless to say that are fairly horrified at the prospect of me giving up a good job and running away to the other side of the planet. If I can convince them, then putting my remaining doubts to one side will be a doddle!

Regards,

[gil]

Good luck with this, Jaideco, if you search "tell parents" on this forum, you'll doubtless find thousands of interesting experiences, right from family cutting the person off, to going with them. I won't bore you with ours, although my dad did stun us all by saying "What a fantastic opportunity, are you having a party before you go?" !!

The common thread that I've observed is, it's got to be your decision after you've taken everything (including other people's opinions)into account. It helped us to remember that different generations have very different ways of seeing job security, finanace, risk etc.

And you never know, they might be thrilled for you along with the worry that parents will alwyas have!

Have a wonderful Christmas, and keep us posted,

Festive love,
Gil and Steve
Love

[Avalon]

Jaideco,

I know this has pretty much been answered, but there is something you may be able to consider - can you ask NTL(?) for a Leave Of Absence for a year or so (usually unpaid but not always). That way - you can have your adventure - adn your job in the UK is open for you if/when you want to return. Not everyone can get them - but its worth asking around. Many UK companies are more than happy to save on a years salary!

You have a huge decision ahead - and its scary. I dont think many of us who have done this did so without being absoultely bloody terrified at one point or another. Sometimes you haev to "Feel the fear and do it anyway". (Hate the book but the sentiment is soooo true.)

I get the feeling that if you were to go for it - your life would change in ways you cant imagine yet. For a start you would know that in future - going for a new job will be a peice of cake compared to moving half way round the world. If you can do that - you can do anything you want to do.

It doesnt have to be permanant. You can come here for a few years, get all you can out of it, then go home a new and revitilised person. Just think of all the stories you would have to tell.

I wish the best for you - whatever you decide - but part of me really hopes you jump off this particular bridge. You never know - you may learn to fly! :)

[Simon & Emily]

Hi Jaideco,

I can only echo what many others have said here - that as this opportunity has landed in your lap grap it with both hands and make the most of the experience with a view of moving back to the UK in the long term if you feel the need later on.

However, as Gill has said, telling your parents may be a different matter. As you may well have read, one of the main reasons people find NZ hard to live in is the separation from close family and friends. With any luck, people will say to you 'Wow, what a great job offer and lifestyle change. I don't want you to go, but make the most of it and there will always be a spare bed back here if things don't work out. When can we come on holiday?' .... or something like that :D

Good luck with whatever you decide to do - please remember that there is a large support network of expats over there (I hope :nice1 ) who will be able to help you through hard times if you feel lonely and ask yourself why you did what you did.

All the best,

Emily

[Hannah]

Hi Jaideco

We came out on 6 month visitor visas with intention to stay six months. my partner has a job and our 2 children are in school here. We don't know if we will stay, and our working experiences will contribute to our decision, but i must say that if we go home we won't see it as 'failure'. If you have a job lined up then the financial risks associated with coming here will be less for you (we spent a lot of savings before my partner got work, and we still haven't received a kiwi dollar in wages yet as he's only just started 2 mths after arriving). In terms of leaving your job behind, i asked for a career break for 6 mths and got one so there was no risk there - my job will be there when/if i return. The only risk i saw was money, and i didn't see 'leaving people behind' as a problem as we always intended to return at the end of the 6 mths. We too are cautious but we put some 'plan b's' and 'plan c's' in place before we left - saving up, getting career break, researching as much as we could before we left, bringing paperwork needed to apply for work permits or PR etc. etc. We've not been adventurous as some on this forum - selling up and moving here, some without even a prior visit, but then i think we're pretty brave being here at all ! All we have risked are our savings, and we're having a ball. Whatever we do at the end of this will be the right thing, and if that means going back to my old job and my old house well, as someone said in an earlier post, think of all the stories i'll have to tell my work colleagues. Maybe setting a return date will give you the courage to go ahead. i don't regret it for one moment (despite the dark early days trying to shop in pak n save!!!). There will be tough days as well as good days, but you will learn more from them than NTL could ever teach you!
Good luck.
hannah

[Juniper]

listening to your two sides argue - the adventurous side and the practical side - i would say that you have to take adventures when you have the chance! if you've already been feeling like you may have missed out earlier in life on some life experiences, then it's time for you to pay attention to that side of yourself.

i'm nearly 30 myself, and i've found that all too often, there is too much going on in life to think about trying new things. in 2002, my husband and i both found ourselves unemployed and very nearly out of cash. there was a potential for my husband to get a job in a couple months, but it was by no means a sure thing. so, did we do the practical thing and pinch our pennies? nope, we realized that there are very few times in our lives when we both have a month free. so, we went to europe for month! there was barely enough room on the credit card, so it was a major gamble (we very well may have had to move in with the relatives if that job didn't materialize). so, the point is, sometimes you need to do something risky, just for the memories!

if you must satisfy your practical side, you can even think of it as a resume builder if you want, lots of people might be impressed by your gumption (for lack of a better word!) just saying you went through with it is worth something.