[Natalieb]

Hi Everyone,

Hope someone can help. Im very worried because in the new year I have to tell all my friends, family, neighbours about our move.

My main worry is telling my parents and am going to suggest to them to come and stay with us for 3 months, each year. One big problem.......They hate flying.

Cruises have a set itinery and one way must cost a fortune. Has anybody else been in this predicament or can offer any advice?

Thanks Natalie

[Trigirl]

natalie - pretty much everyone in the world hates flying longhaul. if what they are flying to is worth it to them they'll survive 24 not too nice hours. don't worry - they'll come. there really aren't any good alternatives to flying to NZ - but perhaps they could try business class?

[willowshouse]

When I told my parents about our move I told them that they now HAD to get comfortable with a computer to make our correspondence easier. They laughed because they are in their 60's and have never touched one, they couldn't even type.

I bought them a laptop (Macbook) with a built-in webcam and microphone/speaker and showed them how we could video-talk with each other using skype. That was all it needed. The thought that they would still be able to see the kids on a regular basis made them so happy.

I have spent quite a bit of time with them on the computer - showing them how to email, get on the internet and skype-call. It is difficult for them, they are not used to learning at this age and it is very new to them but they keep at it and make more and more progress every day. Last week my Dad booked some flights on the internet, on his own, and my Mum was so proud of him she emailed everyone to let them know (it took him 3 hours - that's what I call perseverence!).

I know it won't suit everyone but it has really helped us .. we have badgered 7 of our friends and family to get webcams and now we are planning a busy Christmas skype schedule.

Re: the flight .. I totally agree with Trigirl. My Dad is a smoker and found the 2 x 12 hr flights really hard, but he didn't hesitate to come and see us because it was worth it.

Good luck with spilling the beans!

[Natalieb]

Thanks for that.

I will get my parents over to NZ not matter what, I just dont want them to feel that they cant see their grandchildren growing up etc.

Im going to look into skype and webcams. My dad has a computer and is great with email so im sure it will be ok. I cant imagine doing this years ago when it was all letters which take weeks, but will definately encourage the kids to write letters.

Well done helping your parents get online/webcams/email/skype!

Natalie

[marcia]

Natalie - it is really hard telling everyone, and the flights are not nice, but this time when we came (we went in Jan for a reccy) we did a 14 hour stopover in singapore, we just got off the plane went straight to the transit motel in the airport and slept for 10 hours flat out, had a shower, bit of breakfast and got on the next leg of the flight feeling refreshed. The long haul is hard, but Singapore airlines are brilliant and the entertainment system is fantastic.

My parents had never had acomputer before ,but we sorted one out in July and practised web cam and Skype and emails before we left, my sister and one of my uncles also use it now, and Kev's mum who has been adamant that she can't use one is now having lessons from my dad and her other son - she has realised how easy it is to keep in touch that way. I speak to my parents almost very day.

The hardest things are not being able to give them hugs, and just pop in for a cuppa, or get them to babysit at the drop of a hat, but they understand totally why we have made the move, and even though we have taken their 3 grandchildren away, they know they will have a better life over here.

They are looking forward to coming out next year once we get a house and get settled more. I'm sure then when they have been and seen where we are living and the kind of lifestyle we have (will hopefully have when we find the right house!!) They will feel happier for us, at the moment still being unsettled they feel like they can't help us at all, but they are because they are sorting out all the house stuff - another thread needed for that saga!!

Anyway good luck, and It will all be ok, there will be rough patchs and you'll have days when you wonder what on earth you have done but have a good cry get it out of your system then dust yourself off and move on. Everyone on here is/have gone through many of the same feelings and emotions and will be here to help you through the good, the bad and the ugly!! ;)

[pinkpiggy]

Natalie, I too was dreading telling my family. Making the decision to move was quite an easy one for us as we had already moved 4/5 hours away a couple of years ago when we moved from England to Scotland. Still we knew it would be hard on them.

My dad was fine and he is the one that will probably miss us the most. He is 85 and a whole leg amputee and it's difficult for him to get about, but he knows why we are doing it and has told us to go for it. I guess it's easier for him to understand as he lived in Australia for 25 years, albeit a long time ago.

I told my mum with baited breath. I sat and waited for the outburst but it never came. She said she had been expecting it since we returned from our holiday there in April. My grandparents (who just live a couple of doors away from my mum) were also surprising okay about it. They know they will never come and visit because they are both almost housebound now but are happy for us. I know my mum and her partner will come and visit when they get the chance and my dad, even at 85, is still hoping to visit...once we're there.


I'm sure everything will work out fine. It will be hard but you may just be surprised and this may just be the kind of encouragement they need to get on a plane.

[sarahw]

I thought it would be too much of a bombshell telling my parents straight off so whilst we were going through the process I planted the idea in their heads that we were 'thinking' of emigrating, then we went on our reccy trip, then we made our decision - by the time we actually 'told' them officially they weren't surprised & were thoroughly behind us (and were quite excited about having a new holiday destination!).

My partner's parents are physically challenged but have managed to make the trip - both sets of parents didn't know how to use computers - they now do... my Mum now sends pictures, uses the internet to book flights & e-mails me between 1 & 5 times a day!!

They may surprise you!!
Good luck!

[JohnandCathy]

Hi Nat,

Not much choice I'm afraid, flying will probably be the only sensible option.
I agree with upgrading the flight perhaps but be prepared to spend anything up to £2,500-£3,000 for a return ticket.

Emirates Airlines is a very good option, you can take a few stops along the way - The following route and no flight is longer than 7 hrs.
Economy fares range from £700 - £1000 depending on the time of year

UK-Dubai 7hrs
Dubai-Bangkok 7hrs
Bangkok-Sydney 7hrs
Sydney-NZ 3hrs

I have mentioned this idea on some another posts this week,

Hope this helps,

Cathy

[snailandthewhale]

Hi,

A bit like pinkpiggy, it's been a bit easier for us as we left Scotland for England nearly a year and a half ago. I've already left a job that I loved and all of our friends and family behind.

I feel bad taking the children away from grandparents etc. but the fact is that none of them have travelled down to see us since we moved anyway. We might as well have gone to Auckland 18 months ago.

I don't feel half as bad as I would've done if we'd gone to NZ direct from Scotland.

K

[nippa&pippa]

My parents took ok as got a sister in auckland already but i was 6months pregnant with second child made it harder for them accepted this times as they may not know what she going to be like. Lucky the PR was bit of complication so got bit more time for them to got know to Romilly longer before we left when she was 9months.
For gary's mum, she told me, 'just go! it is worth it and don't ever think about get homesick! I will come out and see all of you soon as i can, next year!' :laugh Bless her, she is 76!! I am looking forward have her for few months next years then!