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karltsmith
Moderator
Joined: 26 Nov 2003
Posts: 570
Location: North Shore, Auckland since March 2004
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Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 1:39 pm Post subject: A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM! |
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I thought I would start this thread to inject even more humour into our lives  . Not that humour is by any means absent from this crowd of wannabie Kiwis  . However it should build into a nice reference collection of crossculture jokes so here goes!
A Kiwi guy walked into an Ozzie pharmacy and said " I'd like to buy some deodorant please" 
The Ozzie Chemist said " Ball or Aerosol" 
The Kiwi replied "Niether mate, it's for my armpits" |
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Tara Sage
I Like It Here
Joined: 27 Feb 2004
Posts: 71
Location: Rangiora New Zealand
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Posted: Sat Jun 19, 2004 12:31 am Post subject: |
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| Nice One |
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captainxmas
I Like It Here
Joined: 29 Mar 2004
Posts: 63
Location: Marlow, in the shadow of the rich people...
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Posted: Sat Jun 19, 2004 4:40 am Post subject: Here goes... |
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The Rugby World Cup Final, an Ozzie is enjoying the match with typical decorum and the seat next to him is empty.
A fellow Ozzie spectaor nods to the seat and asks, "What's with the seat mate, did you have a spare ticket?"
The Ozzie replys, "Yeah, it was for my wife, but sadly she passed away."
The other man looks sad for a moment, then asks, "Did you have any family or mates that could come?"
"Nah mate, they're all at the funeral.".....
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Timbo
Thoroughly Good Egg
Joined: 21 May 2004
Posts: 290
Location: Epsom England
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Posted: Sat Jun 19, 2004 5:22 am Post subject: |
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A guy takes his Rottwieler to the vets. "My dog is cross eyed,is there anything you can do for him". "Well", says the vet, "lets have a look at him". So he picks the dog up and checks his eyes, then his teeth. After a short while the vet says "I`m going to have to put him down".
"God NO " says the owner, "just cos he`s cross eyed.
"No, because he`s really heavy" |
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Lisa.
I Like It Here
Joined: 09 Jun 2004
Posts: 58
Location: England
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Posted: Sat Jun 19, 2004 8:16 am Post subject: |
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Nice one guys  Anymore??? |
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Azazel
I Like It Here
Joined: 08 Jan 2004
Posts: 64
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Posted: Sat Jun 19, 2004 11:13 pm Post subject: Re: A FUNNY THING HAPPENED ON THE WAY TO THE FORUM! |
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| karltsmith wrote: | A Kiwi guy walked into an Ozzie pharmacy and said " I'd like to buy some deodorant please"
The Ozzie Chemist said " Ball or Aerosol"
The Kiwi replied "Niether mate, it's for my armpits" |
An old Not the Nine O'Clock News joke but the pharmacist was Swedish.
Always a good one though :) |
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Timbo
Thoroughly Good Egg
Joined: 21 May 2004
Posts: 290
Location: Epsom England
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Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 12:53 am Post subject: |
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My wife returned from a shopping trip yesterday looking very pleased with herself. When I asked why she looked so cheerfull, she told me that someone had complimented her on her driving skills. A bit puzzled, knowing how bad a driver she is, I asked what she meant.
"oh, they put a note on my windscreen. It said Parking Fine. That was nice of them wasn`t it"  |
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karltsmith
Moderator
Joined: 26 Nov 2003
Posts: 570
Location: North Shore, Auckland since March 2004
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Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:28 am Post subject: |
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Q-Why do they bury Ozzies 6 ft down in Australia and twelve feet down in NZ
A:- Because deep down Ozzies are really nice people!
Sorry to all you Ozzies....heard this one last week! |
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